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May 20, 2010 at 02:30 pm by Molls
As far as I’m concerned, all these Twilight movies are good for is turning out hot boring people for us to look at. Exhibit H: Xavier Samuel. I don’t know who this cat is or where he came from, but one thing is for sure: I’d do him.
Apparently this dude’s character, Riley, doesn’t even play that large of a role in the Twilight books, so it’s odd that they’d release a new poster for Eclipse featuring just him, but hey! If those folks making these movies have figured out one thing, it’s that looks matter more than content. Am I right!?!? Am I right!?!?
So question: Samuel, Lautner or Pattinson? Who would you “do”? (You know what I’m talkin’ about. Wink wink. (I’m talking about sex.))
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25 Responses to “Rub One Out To This, Twihards”
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Photoshop much? He looks good on the poster, but they don’t always look that great in real life, or even in the movie for that matter…
Agreed. The whole twilight thing blows dumpster juice.
I would prefer to do Lautner. I wouldn’t say “no” to any of them (I’m not daft), but Pattinson’s hotness kind of peaked in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. If he still looked like that, I would choose him every time.
Taylor Lautner may have what some call “dumbface,” but his absurdly sculpted body compensates handsomely for any of his shortcomings.
That said, I have yet to read or watch anything “Twilight.”
OMFG Molls seriously? Grow up.
LOL. Relax, homie. It’s all just fer funnn.
Sure molls, the Twilight series has made hundreds of millions of dollars without your stupid drug addicted advice and yet you are going to bash them for what they are about to do on an upcoming release. You are one stupid mother funking idiot. Grow up, please. If you were my daughter I swear I would have you euthanized like a fucking worthless animal.
beet I know you have rules about your own blog, but if I was molls I certainly would expect comments like this, and commenters like this to get blocked. Seriously, is the hit income from a comment like this really worth it? I note most of molls’ stories end with questions, strategically positioning for the audience to click and comment, and answer the question. Is this really though the discussion you seek on this site. sheesh.
If this bothers you, you should see what he writes when he doesn’t like you!
Censorship = communism, you red fuck
I agree.
Censorship = all government.
ass face, get a life
Ok, I take back what I said earlier, I just Google Image’d him, and he is SMOKIN’ hawt. Phew, that poster does not do him justice, he looks WAY hotter in his candids than here, even as far as saying he looks better than Rob & Tay put together. Sheeet. Gotta go quench myself now.
this guy.
lautner is the same age as my high school senior little brother and pattinson is just unattractive, weird and dirty.
I would shag Lautner, marry Pattinson and avoid Samuel.
Shag Samuel, shag Aidan Turner (the vampire Mitchell from Being Human), shag Stephen Murray (from Primeval), marry Andrew Lee-Potts, avoid anyone associated with Twilight.
Oh, I approve of you. I mean, your taste is a bit different from mine. But avoiding Twilight? A marvelous suggestion.
Andrew Lee-Potts! ♥
Your icon is the Stay-Puffed Marshmallow Man. That is pretty excellent.
Damn it, now you’ve gone and done it.
pattinson, lautner and lutz are not attractive at all, at least this guy is a little normal looking. the other look all sorts of weird. also twilight is awful, and it’s so, so upsetting to see adult ass women reading the books and swooning over pattinson…ugh
holy shit, i just googled him and he looks nothing like he does in the poster…retract last comment. all the twilight fucks are gross.
after this hilarious post, i’d do you. wink wink….just funnin’
all of them, not all at once of course.
maybe if i focus on this enough it will invade my dreams tonight. :)
You try too hard. It’s painful, at times.