…and BTW, Darlene from Roseanne (Sara Gilbert), is by far the most interesting person they have tapped. The other co-hosts for the attempted recreation of the ABC daytime staple are Real Housewife of NY, Bethenny Frankel, Julie Chen and Lisa Rinna. A source told the NY Post, “It’s a daytime panel show to take on ‘The View,’ targeted at women with children and hosted by celebrities, journalists and regular moms. A pilot will be shot in early May.” So it’s the exact same show, on a lamer network with lamer co-hosts and no Barbara Walters-level ballin’ ass bitches behind it? Lameballs.

I love the idea of these kinds of shows. In fact, my love of The View is pretty well-documented, but if the co-hosts aren’t dynamic and interesting, then the show winds up having the opposite effect. It makes women look vapid and with views not worth hearing about. We hear enough of Bethenny Frankel on Real Housewives and all over the tabloids, Lisa Rinna bores the hell out of me and frankly, I don’t know or care enough about Julie or Sara to tune in for them.

Who would you like to see hosting a show like this?

Gabourey Sidibe, the actress who played Precious in the Oscar-winning film Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire is set to host Saturday Night Live this weekend and after seeing these just-released promos starring Andy Samberg, I’m thinking she’s gonna tear that shit up. Seasoned pros often film these SNL spots and can barely get a giggle out of me, but all four of Gabby’s promos show that she’s got great timing and a good amount of confidence, too. What more could you ask for in an SNL host?

I’m thinking that if the show goes as well as I think it will for Gabourey, Howard Stern may have to take back all those things he said about her.

We don’t know Nicole “Snooki Nudes” Polizzi as the classiest lady and the details of her most recent break-up aren’t exactly helping her change that rep. The Snookster broke up with her boyfriend Emilio Masella on his voicemail, according to the dumpee. I thought it was bad when my ex dumped me on a flip phone, but this is really bad. I mean, at least I got the best of his anytime minutes.

For whatever reason Emilio hasn’t sold this message, but he did give a statement to People about the break-up:

“I told Nicole I tried out for Real World and she was upset. She thought I was using her to get on the show which is ridiculous.” An argument ensued, and at 6:30 a.m. on Sunday, he received a voicemail from his angry girlfriend saying, “You’re nothing. You’re single.”

OK, awesome. Emilio is implying that Snooki was implying that she has so much fame and/or star appeal that MTV would cast a boyfriend of a Jersey Shore housemate on The Real World and create some sort of totally inevitable and bizarre spin-off? IDK, Snook. IDK.

And there’s more:

Masella was confused and tried to call her back, but she hung up on him. What he didn’t expect were the allegations of infidelity — “I’d never cheat on her–I love her,” he says — and the rumors that Snooki hooked up with her costar Mike “the Situation” Sorrentino on Monday.

“I talked to her yesterday and I was like, ‘You know I’d never cheat on you; I’d never do something so low,’” he says. “She said she hadn’t hooked up with anybody [either] — but she freakin’ lied to me. She put out there that I cheated, which is ridiculous, and now the tables have turned. It sucks.”

Reps for the Jersey Shore star have not return calls for comment.

1) These people are like human cess pools. 2) LOL. I can’t believe Snooki has a rep.

Oh, also, these two are totally doing that thing that everyone did with their high school sweetheart when they broke up the first week of college freshman year:

“I talked to her yesterday afternoon and I fought with her,” he says. “I [told her] she has no reason to be mad — and she hung up on me. I told her, ‘You can’t expect me to stay home and never go out if you’re gone for two months.’”

“But I’m not a scumbag,” he says. “She said, ‘If you want to have fun, bye,’ and she hung up. She’s being very jealous and spiteful.”

Remember, these two just met in January and Snooki’s been filming a reality show in another city for at least the last few weeks. All this drama over a split-second relationship? Ugh.

Ah, nothing but the classiest of news from the always-eloquent Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay tweeted earlier this morning that her ex, Samantha Ronson, was less than pleased to see her at a Coachella after-party last night — so less than pleased that she hocked one back and stuck it to Lindsay’s face.

Linds also claims that Ronson left the party with (the only real way he’s known) Miley Cyrus’ ex-boyfriend, Justin Gaston.

Sam took it upon herself to address the rumors regarding her projectile bodily secretions, too, saying, “Guess what didn’t happen tonight.”  Right.  Of course.  Facepalm.  Fourth-grade, I forgot.

Truth or lie, classy, ladies. Really … classy.  Go drink milkshakes and make up or something.  The publicity stunts are getting worse and worse as the months that you’re apart go by, no matter who’s behind them.

Cameron Douglas, the least-famous Douglas of all the Douglases, was sentenced to five years in prison and a fine of $300k for reparations of the intent to distribute meth, cocaine and heroin.

Cameron’s father is none other than Michael Douglas, who is trying to take the blame by fame and a family history of drug abuse for his son’s downfall.  Uh, that’s pretty super, Dad, but the kid’s not going to learn a damn thing if everyone makes excuses for him.

Michael penned a five-page letter to the judge overseeing Cameron’s case and stated myriad reasons as to why Cameron turned out the way he did:

“He is an adult and responsible for his own actions. We do know, however, that genes, family and peer pressure are a strong influence on a substance abuser … I have some idea of the pressure of finding your own identity with a famous father. I’m not sure I can comprehend it with two generations to deal with.”

It was reported years ago that Cameron was hooked on drugs around the age of thirteen and only attempted to clean up his act when the family threatened to cut him off from their fortunes.

During the trial, Cameron was said to be contrite and cooperative with the investigation. Prior to yesterday’s sentencing, Cameron read a letter that he, himself, had penned regarding his behavior:

“I apologize to my family and loved ones for this nightmare and my behavior … to the court for my decisions and actions. I want to be a productive family member and role model for others to get advice, guidance and support and steer them in the right direction.”

I wonder how long he’s actually going to spend behind bars. I also wonder if this wake-up call is of enough caliber to show him that he’s fucked up on a grand-scale. Substance abuse sucks but once you go beyond using to dealing to distributing, it’s no joke — you’re no longer a small-time thorn in the DEAs side. I think the kid got way in over his head in this situation and relied on Daddy’s money and pull to drag him out of it. While I’m glad to see a pusher off the streets, it’s still pretty sad that someone can be deluded enough to think that their “star” will prevent them from having to face accountability.

Courtney Love is no longer Courtney Love. She’s decided to take on an image overhaul that’s expected to take the rest of her remaining years on Earth by dropping her stage name, “Love,” and it’s not because she feels like she might actually get some work because of it, either.

Courtney states that her last name has “oppressed” her practically since taking it on back in the eighties as a part of her stage persona. The disgruntled star speaks out and states that she wants to go back to her roots of “Courtney Michelle Harrison,” which is her real(ish) name.

Whatever-she-wants-to-be-called-these-days speaks to Britain’s NME Magazine and states that calling her by her “Love” moniker is a good way to oppress her (and send her into a barbiturate-induced rage of Mork and Mindy-like rantings, I’m sure):

“We’ve all decided we don’t like her (Courtney Love) any more. We love her when she goes on stage but I don’t need her in the rest of my life. (Call me) Courtney Michelle. The name Courtney Love is a way to oppress me.”

First of all, “we?” Who the fuck is she talking about, her multiple personalities? Or is she speaking for the general public? I don’t get it. Is the angsty performer trying to pick a fight? ‘Cause you KNOW no one’s going to refer to crazy bitch as “Courtney Michelle.” It makes me think of a long-lost Olsen twin and then I get to gagging up my breakfast at the image of Mary-Kate and Ashley sharing a womb with a view of Courtney Love. She’s digging herself into a hole by doing this. I can’t wait to hear the first round of Courtney Michelle-dissenters voicing their yak about her name-change and the Twitter retaliation thereafter.

Have at it, Court. This should be some good, old-fashioned entertainment.