Mar 18, 2010 at 07:08 am by Sarah


Just weeks after thrusting a living thing out of her nether regions, Gisele Bundchen takes the cover of April’s Vogue and looks as if she never experienced the horrors of pregnancy.  Ever.

Bundchen gave one of those water-births where you peacefully soak in a lukewarm tub in a dimmed room and it’s all peaceful and zen and shit and she didn’t “give birth”, her son “came through her body”, which sounds what like any delicate, virginal supermodel would go through during birth, naturally.  Bundchen claimed to only gain thirty pounds during her podding pregnancy and claimed to feel spiritual and empowered throughout the entire ordeal.

What Vogue didn’t tell you was that her Boston penthouse tub was probably filled with diamond-encrusted rose petals and Tom Brady was the one who gave birth instead.

Congrats on looking so post-pregnancy fabulous to the beautiful, peaceful, empowered Gisele who doesn’t even remotely look like she’s endured the rigors of ruptured facial veins due to eighty hours of pushing on a cold steel table or episiotomies and shitting all over yourself while screaming “You lousy fuck!” at your husband.

Mar 18, 2010 at 06:53 am by Evil Beet

Her most recent interview with Parade magazine is surprisingly mature and interesting. She doesn’t come off like an obnoxious teenager, and she doesn’t come off like a pretentious starlet. She sounds intelligent and thoughtful and oddly relateable. To be honest, the older she gets, the more Miley impresses me as a bona fide talent. She’s currently on the interview circuit for her upcoming flick, The Latest Song (which she filmed in Australia, which is where she met Liam). I’m very interested to see how she performs in her first “real” movie role. The trailer’s above, and, I’ll be honest — I like it.

Some highlights from her interview:

Finding unbiased love with Liam Helmsworth
“[Liam has] become my best friend in the whole wide world. I love him. He really respects me for who I am because coming from Australia, he really didn’t know me as the celebrity I am here. I got to tell him about myself on my own terms and my own way. He had no preconceived notion of who I was supposed to be.”

Her relationship with the ever-present paparazzi

“The other day I felt a little bit in danger for the first time because there were too many photographers following me in too many cars. And I have to ask myself, ‘Why would any other 50-year-old man who was stalking a 17-year-old girl go to jail, but not these guys? I’m not as American as anyone else?’ I mean, they couldn’t sit outside of a high school but they can sit outside my recording studio. It’s creepy.”

Knowing her faith
“The one thing I’m really strong about regarding my religious beliefs is that you should know a little bit about everything before you define your own beliefs. I think all religions have a good practice in them. Liam and I have been reading about Buddhism lately and it’s all about hope and love. To me, faith is about having a clean slate and a clean start.”

And what does she think about ditching Hannah Montana?

“What I am sure about is I’m going to rejoice and be happy to finally not have to be … well, to not be somebody I’m not exactly,” she says. “”As I’ve grown into it, I’ve grown out of it,” she says. “When I was 12, I thought, ‘I want to be famous all the time! I want everybody to recognize me! … [But] I hate being thought of as a product. I am not a doll, and people want to treat me that way… I’m older now. I have an opinion. I have my own taste.”

I love it! Just don’t develop a taste for cocaine, pretty please? I want you to be like the Lindsay Lohan who never gets hooked on drugs. TEAM MILEY!

Mar 18, 2010 at 05:45 am by Sarah

Kim Kardashian eats like the rest of us and I love her for it.  [Celebslam]

Demi Moore is gorgeous … for any age.  [popbytes]

Interesting new read: Impossible Motherhood regarding a woman who’s had 15 abortions in 17 years.  [Pajiba]

What, Madonna’s dating some other pre-pubescent boy now?  [Celebitchy]

Admit it: you hate Tila Tequila because she’s better than you.  [Litely Salted]

The photo that’s going to drive Heidi Montag to total plastic-ness.  [Amy Grindhouse]

Did Paris get a nose job?  No … it’s just Photoshop.  [Cityrag]

Real Housewives Bethenny Frankel tries to channel Jackie O.  [Pop on the Pop]

Mar 18, 2010 at 05:24 am by Evil Beet

Do the tabloid covers speak the truth? Sure sounds like it. After InTouch magazine hit stands yesterday morning screaming that Sandra Bullock’s husband, Jesse James, had an 11-month affair with a a tattoo model, Sandra backed out of the UK premiere of The Blind Side. Warner Bros issued this statement: “Due to unforeseen personal reasons a trip abroad to support The Blind Side has been deemed impossible at this time. I apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused and thank you for your continued support of the film.”

Late Wednesday, People reported that Sandra had peaced out of the house she shared with Jesse just days before the tabloids hit the street.

And did anyone else notice that she didn’t explicitly thank him in her Oscar acceptance speech?

So what’s the dirt on Jesse’s cheating? Here’s an except from InTouch’s article:

When Sandra Bullock thanked her bad-boy husband, Jesse James, as she accepted her best actress Oscar for The Blind Side, she may not have known that while she was away shooting the film, Jesse was carrying on a steamy affair with a tattoo model. While Jesse has had an 11-month affair, including five weeks of sex, with Michelle “Bombshell” McGee, she believed he and Sandra were no longer together. “I would never have hooked up with him if I thought he was a married man,” Michelle tells In Touch in an exclusive interview. “He gave me the impression they were separated.” For weeks, while Sandra was in Atlanta shooting The Blind Side, Michelle had sex at least once a week with the Monster Garage star. Far from a one-night stand, his relationship with Michelle was intimate and highly charged. Michelle even says she called Jesse, who didn’t wear underwear or condoms, by a special pet name, Vanilla Gorilla, because he was so “well-endowed.

While Jesse was in Atlanta with Sandra when she started to film The Blind Side, Michelle sent West Coast Choppers a friend request because she hoped to snag a modeling gig there. She was surprised that it was actually Jesse who wrote back to her and told her to e-mail him at his personal e-mail. From the start, Jesse wanted to meet Michelle, and it was never about business: “He started saying, ‘Do you want to hang out?’” So a week after he got in touch, Michelle drove two hours from her San Diego home to West Coast Choppers in LA. “I got there around 9 at night,” remembers Michelle, who was starstruck at first. “I was like, ‘Holy s**t. It’s really Jesse James.’” After taking Michelle on a tour of his garage, Jesse brought her into his office and locked the door. “We ended up on the couch,” she says. “He wanted to watch movies, but I asked him, ‘What’s going on with you and Sandra?’” Jesse was evasive. “He said, ‘She doesn’t live here. She has a house in Austin. She is filming, and I can’t talk about it.’” Assuming he and Sandra were separated, Michelle continued talking to Jesse, she says, and then, “We had intimate relations.” Michelle says she and Jesse had sex “two or three times,” that night — and began what she believed was a serious relationship, texting each other several times a day, and meeting up for sex at least twice a week for the next five weeks.

Woooow, so the Vanilla Gorilla cheated on his wife and didn’t use a condom? CLASSY ON ALL COUNTS.

You picked a real shitty time to do this, Jesse. Sandra’s always going to be America’s Sweetheart, and we love her even more after her Oscar win and gracious acceptance speech. MOVE ON, Sandra. You deserve way better than this dude.

Oh, and the chick he cheated with, Michelle “Bombshell” McGee. There’s a ton of photos of her in the gallery. I’m not a tattoo hater or anything, but I think this chick looks kinda gutter trash. And by “kinda” I mean “excruciatingly.” But, then again, any chick who sells a story like this to a tabloid is gutter trash in my mind.

Mar 18, 2010 at 03:37 am by Sarah


Okay, so, the guy did what he did, dropped out of the spotlight and plans to play the Masters next month, managed to salvage a semblance of his marriage and yet there are still allegations from women coming out claiming that they were The One and they have the proof to, well, prove it.

The latest comes from porn star Joslyn James who set up a new domain name last week: sextingjoslynjames.com.  … So crafty, Ms. James, just … crafty. James claims to have authentic Tiger Woods smut-texts on her phone and will be releasing all of the information in her possession today, on her site, at 11 AM ET.

Definitely a pathetic attempt to suck some more fame from this withered story, but whatevs; she’s a working woman, she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do to pay the pimps bills.  Maybe she just hasn’t gotten the memo yet that it’s so 2009 to out Tiger Woods on his wandering gonads.

Mar 17, 2010 at 05:05 pm by Molls

It was reported earlier this week that Britney Spears and her man Jason Trawick were dunzo, but that might not be the case. According to sources close to to Britney, Jason was seen over at her place this past weekend and the supposedly-off couple was also spotted at an LA hotel together.

According to the source, they’re doing the “on/off” thing, which I’m sure we all know is probably totally (not) healthy for Spears, whose prone to acting all kinds of unstable. The source continued on to say,”Most everyone else abandoned her, but Jason refused to be completely cut out of Britney’s life. He’s very protective of her.”

Damn. Britney’s come so far this past year. Her dad Jamie’s roll in her life has worked wonders. I hope that she’s able to kick the sometimes-boyfriend before things get really messy and sticks close to her pops.