So, at first I didn’t really get Shia LaBeouf and Carey Mulligan as a couple. I guess I didn’t realize that she’s completely adorable and seemingly normal and that maybe, just maybe, having his fingers taped together for over a year has taught Shia a lesson in slowing down. Then today I saw these photos of the pair at a craft store in the Valley. They were smiling, consulting with each other on purchases, she adorably propped her little head up against the canvas she was holding outside while he enjoyed a cigarette. She doesn’t even seem annoyed that she has to stand there and wait with him while holding that huge thing. I mean, I think I have a crush on this cool-looking, put together, sweet girl. I want to do crafts with her too! That seems safe and comfortable, and dare I say, the kind of normalcy that most people crave. I think these two could hang in there for awhile.

That’s right. That’s a picture of Russell Brand’s crotch n’ legs. Happy Thursday, you guys.

For those of you who aren’t keeping up, there was quite a debate over the cloth covering (and not covering) Russell’s legs the other day when he stepped out in a pair of short shorts and hot pink knee socks. Some of you agreed with me that he looked like a fool who was just trying to make a spectacle of himelf, others probably called me a bitch but I only skimmed their comment because I have a massive ego to keep intact and a couple of you said that they were just a nod to his favorite football team back home, West Ham.

Well, here’s another dimension to this thrilling story: Yesterday Russell was seen wearing shorter shorts and redder socks into the gym. For those of you who suggested that he might be repping his love for West Ham with the hot pink pair he was wearing the other day, check out these socks. I don’t know anything about football (American or Euro), but I do recognize those team colors to be West Ham’s. I guess that means that we’ve still got a mystery on our hands: Why would a grown-ass man want to be seen in public in hot pink knee-high socks?

Keep checking back for more updates as Russell Brand Sock Watch ’09 continues to go down before our eyes. I am thrilled to bring you every detail about what this man is putting on his feet to absorb sweat so he doesn’t ruin his sneakers.

With all the dudes getting kicked in the nuts and Chis Crockers and horny web-cam chicks and teen girls dancing in their bedroom to songs with suggestive lyrics that clog up the works on YouTube, you’d probably think that the most popular clip every uploaded to the site would most likely be something along those lines. However, it was just officially announced today that the number one video in the site’s history is Susan Boyle’s incredibly moving Britain’s Got Talent audition. (Sorry, no embed option for this video.)

From Hollyscoop:

Susan became a household name overnight after appearing on Britain’s Got Talent, and has managed to get over 120 million views on YouTube. The second place winner was a very funny and popular clip entitled “David After Dentist,” which didn’t even come close with 37 million views.

“JK Wedding Entrance Dance,” which featured a wedding party walking down the aisle to Chris Brown’s Forever placed third with 33 million. “The Twilight Saga: New Moon” movie trailer took fourth place, scoring 31 million, while the “Evian Roller Babies” clip took fifth place with more than 27 million views.

It’s honestly alarming that the majority of popular clips on YouTube have messages of hope or love behind them. As much as you may hate Chris Brown, I can’t ask you to not cry when the bride finally enters during this video because it’s impossible.

In a world where Nickelback is the most popular band of the decade, Daniel Powter is the number-one one hit wonder, and where Jon and Kate get more coverage than the financial crisis we are in, it’s refreshing to see that people are still seeking out heartwarming entertainment on their own. You just need to go to the Internet, the amazing place where all things are possible, in order to find it I guess. Love you, Internet!

The dude who’s been on Scrubs forever and wrote and starred in Garden State, Zach Braff is not too happy that his home state is now being associated with hilariously crappy MTV reality show, Jersey Shore. Apparently Zach feels like the state has just survived being associated with the mob for the rest of eternity because of The Sopranos, and said to Jimmy Kimmel Tuesday night, ”Jersey had a chance to be known for something else, and here comes Snooki.” (Side note: I would like to encourage you to read Snooki’s “biography” on MTV.com even if you’ve never seen the show. It’s pretty delish.)

While I understand that Zach doesn’t want New Jersey to be forever associated with orange, muscular drunks with anger management issues, I have to ask him this: Are lovey dovey romcoms about crazy families and Manic Pixie Dream Girls set to the sounds of all things “indie” really that much better? I’d have to say that long before Zach tried to make a deep cultural impact on all of us with what it means to be from New Jersey, there was someone doing it in a slightly less annoying manner than him. (I said “slightly”.) At least Kevin Smith movies were awesome when you were 15 and didn’t make you cry and feel like you’d die alone when you were 22. Just sayin’.

(the language in this clip may be NSFW if you work at a boring place. Sorry.)

photo from Willow Street Pictures

The couple that I didn’t even know about until it was announced that they were getting a divorce might finally be close to sealing that deal. In fact, sources from the inside are talking and they’re saying that it’s a mere matter of moments (well, probably days) until the papers are signed and the divorce is finalized.

Jon and Kate Gosselin were married for a decade (I’m telling you, people! Worst decade ever!) and the last handful of years were spent on television with their family, writing books, getting kind of famous, being chased down by paparazzi, and eventually, starting new relationships. This public display of rotten humanity has been fascinating (and simultaneously horrifying) for people who don’t even know who they are to watch. Why? I think because this is the ultimate example of what the popular American trend of “trying to get famous” can do to normal people.

Things have gotten so out of control for fame-hungry Jon that on December 10th, a judge had to check him and tell him to stop violating his contract with TLC by making media appearances. Kate may not be much better herself, but Jon with his younger girlfriends and CZ earrings and tipping off the paparazzi… I mean, do they offer therapy for people who go through stuff like this? How are these people who got famous as a couple deal as individuals when news stops popping up about them and there’s no reason to write about them anymore?

Everyone at this LA premiere was dressed like the ’80s came back and they were angry. Ahem.

Audrina Patridge: FAIL. I’m itchy and hot just looking at that get-up.

Michelle Rodriguez: GIANT FAIL. She looks like she rolled out of bed and went to try on prom dresses at Forever 21.

Zoe Saldana: It’s like Tonya Harding got a hold of a perfectly nice dress and asked herself how she could add a little more “white trash” to it. Haaaate it so much, but Zoe’s so damn beautiful she can get away with almost anything. Almost.