While I was passed out on my friend’s floor with my chihuahua next to me sleeping off my turkey and cheap wine hangover, Amanda Seyfried was being a real American and Black Friday-ing her face off at MY Bed, Bath & Beyond. I missed her, you guys! I love Amanda Seyfried! I love her so much! And there she was! Sniffin’ candles and buying linens on the cheap on the craziest shopping day of the year at the very same Bed, Bath & Beyond I go to when I feel like sniffin’ candles and getting linens. What the hell, Universe? I knew I was sleeping through crazy steals and deals, but I had no idea I was sleeping through Seyfried. Shit. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to swear, but SHIT. God, what would that encounter have been like? “Hey, I’m Molls. I’m from the Internet. I really really loved you in Mean Girls and I am a huge Big Love fan. I never saw Jennifer’s Body and I heard it sucked, but like, I’m a gossip blogger and I’ve never said an unkind word about you.” and then she’d be like, “Cool.” and then I’d be mobbed by security and taken behind the Border’s next door to have my ass kicked. Maybe it worked out for the best that I wasn’t there. Maybe that’s the way it was supposed to be.

Did any of you brave the Black Friday madness?

Lindsay Lohan may be out and drinking, but there’s a reason we’re seeing less and less photographic evidence of it. Turns out her bodyguards are officially on photo deletion duty and it doesn’t matter if you’re just some bridge and tunnel nobody or a peer of some sort: if you take a picture of Lohan without her permission on private property, she will have you man handled.

Today the NY Post is reporting that Gabe Saporta, that guy from that band that Pete Wentz got tattooed on his leg, was recently DJing at an NYC club where he was partying with Lindsay and her brother, Michael Jr. Apparently Gabe got a little bit ahead of himself because he grabbed a picture of Lohan on his BlackBerry and moments later had the device taken by her security. All photos were deleted in the phone before it was returned to the humbled DJ.

I guess this policy makes sense, but it woulda been great had they gotten on top of that say, back in 2002 when actual reputations could have been saved?

“There’s tons of fans and we hear all of these high pitch voices and we hear ‘Rah, rah, Taylor, Taylor!’ All of a sudden I hear this deep voice behind me: ‘Taylor, Taylor!’ …. And this guy walks up to me and he goes ‘Hey … my daughter is a huge fan, and I’m a huge fan is there any way I can get a picture with you. I’m Jamie Foxx.’ I was like, ‘Are you kidding me? Can I get a picture with you?’”

– Taylor Lautner on George Lopez’s talk show, sounding surprised that even Jamie Foxx wants a piece of his hotness.

Ed Note: This is a cross-post from our sister site Zelda Lily and is written by Sarah Spangenberg. The original post is here.

Good Morning America has never been one to shy away from controversy and this time — well, this time they haven’t, either. To the contrary: they’ve actually stirred it up more than ever before and encouraged the brou-ha-ha surrounding Adam Lambert’s performance on the recent American Music Awards with some homo-avoidant behavior.

After Adam Lambert’s “X”-rated, crotch-bulging, anal-fisting performance at the American Music Awards (which I thought was the hotness), he’s been barred from performing on Good Morning America. However, they have Chris “Mashed Rihanna” Brown slated to appear for interview and performance. So Good Morning America found it in their hearts to forgive a frequently-blacks-out-from-anger woman-beater, but in the same bated breath they’re too prude to succumb to the awesomeness and sexual naiveté that is Adam Lambert.

Good Morning America, get your prude, pink, chubby fist out of your ass — like, yesterday.

Who’s next, OJ Simpson via live feed from prison?

I have to admit, I don’t quite understand this:

Professional golfer Tiger Woods was seriously injured in a car accident early this morning, the Florida Highway Patrol just reported.

Woods, 33, pulled out of his driveway in the Isleworth community about 2:25 a.m. when he struck a fire hydrant, and then drove into a tree at his neighbor’s property, FHP reported.

Woods was transported to Health Central Hospital in Ocoee in serious condition, FHP said. No other information about his condition has been released. A Health Central hospital employee said at 2:30 p.m. that Woods was not a patient. A hospital operator would not say if Woods had been treated and released.

FHP said the airbags in Woods’ Cadillac Escalade did not deploy, which means the vehicle was traveling under 33 mph.

Police say charges are pending, but that no alcohol was involved. How do you get seriously injured running your Escalade into a fire hydrant at low speeds? Because, like, if I had to go to the hospital every time I accidentally ran my SUV into, ya know, a parking garage wall, I’d just have a regular parking spot at the damn hospital.

Either way, I sincerely hope he’s okay and has a speedy recovery. Just not speedy enough to run into a fire hydrant.

Don’t say I never do anything nice for you. :)