Shakira’s new video came out today and uhhh… I don’t get it? I feel really dense and I’m sure I’ll find out from one of you commenters within minutes of posting this, but what the hell is going on here? Shakira is in some sort of trantric sex dance on a bed with a dude, then in a steam room. Is this supposed to be like that show Sisters? Didn’t they all go in a steam room on that show? Oh, and the song is probably the most annoying thing I’ve ever heard. She sounds like Grover.

Howard K. Stern and doctors  Khristine Eroshevich, Sandeep Kapoor will be going to trial for a long list of felonies relating to the death of Anna Nicole Smith. The doctors are accused of supplying Stern with the drugs he needed to keep Anna Nicole in the haze that she was in up until the time that she eventually overdosed.

Stern alone is responsible for over 11 felony accounts, including giving prescription drugs to an addict, acquiring those drugs illegally and fraud. Kapoor is also screwed. During the previous investigation, the following passage was found in his journal, “I was making out with Anna, my patient, blurring the lines … I gave her methadone, Valium. Can she ruin me?”

The death of Anna Nicole has always stood out to me as incredibly sad because it was clear that in her messed up state, Anna had been allowing a lot of people to take advantage of her for a long time. Stern, who many saw on Anna Nicole’s E! reality show had been with her for a long time and even when she was top dog in the relationship, he often seemed both manipulative and emotionally abusive toward her. Their relationship was never appropriate, and when he saw that he could possibly gain control of her estate if she was dead, well, it wouldn’t surprise me if he turns up to be guilty on most of those charges.

Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa’s Halloween episode had the pair dressing up from everyone to Beyonce and her dancers in the “Single Ladies” video to Bachelorette contestants, but of course you know my favorite was when they took on The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Regis saying “tick as teves”? I nearly had a stroke from laughing. By the way, if any one is dressing up as Caroline Manzo this year: You are my hero. Please feel free to email me photos of you and your bubbies.

Sean Preston and Jayden James, the sons of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline, hit up a pumpkin patch in LA yesterday with their dad. The boys looked so happy, healthy and normal that it was almost shocking. As babies, the boys were often seen drooped over their mother’s shoulder, in tears or looking sad. In these photos the boys couldn’t look more thrilled to share a day of fun with their dad and nanny. While Britney’s parenting has seen a major turn around since she lost custody, there’s no question that these boys are happy when they spend time with their papa. [photos via ONTD]

Taylor Swift got pranked at Ellen the other day and apparently she had the pants scared off her so badly that she wound up on the bathroom floor of her dressing room. Taylor was a really good sport about the prank and laughed until she and Ellen embraced, but her reaction definitely implied that she was freakin’ out there for a moment.

Victoria Beckham is known for having one of the skinniest bods in all the land, so why would she be hitting the gym every day of the week? Apparently she works out that hard so that she can ensure that no one needs to airbrush her. She told Harpar’s Bazaar “I wanted to look at those pictures in 20 years’ time and say ‘Wow, look — after three kids — I didn’t look bad.’”

While I suppose that’s a fair goal (wanting to be as fit as possible is not a crime, in or out of the spotlight), but I can’t imagine that Victoria has any problem areas that need to be kept in check. Not only is she fit looking, but she’s very very skinny looking, which are two different things. I can’t imagine that she even has any fat or excess skin to hang, let alone get out of control.

All of this points to a greater image problem that Beckham might have. Perhaps a little body dysmorphia? A friend close to the Beckham’s told US Weekly “She’s not the most confident of girls, believe it or not,” and also says that she’s had three surgeries on her breasts– two augmentations, and then this year, a reduction.

Posh is getting older and while body dysmorphia isn’t strictly for teens and women in their 20s in any way, it’s a shame that this woman who’s gorgeous and married to one of the most handsome men in the world has to fight demons like this. I’m pretty sure most people would take her even if she gained 100 pounds.