Turns out the “tool” in Tool Academy isn’t a joke. Tyler Synon, a contestant on season two of the show, was arrestd last night in Arizona for acting like a big, drunken tool. The charges? Criminal damage and disorderly conduct. Oh, and how did the arresting officers know that they had a Tool Academy cast member on their hands? Apparently Tyler has a huge Tool Academy tattoo on his leg. Forever. Because that’s the kind of thing a non-tool would get tattooed on his body, right?
Tyler was drinking heavily at a bar where he started some shit with other patrons. After a waiter asked him to leave, Tyler took a swing at him and, on his way out the door, he decided to take out his anger on a wall and a sign, damaging them both. Tyler is responsible for a 900 dollar fine now, 500 of which he has to pay up front to be released and the rest is due within three days. He’s a TV star now, so I’m sure his unemployment won’t keep him from getting that money right back to them. Ha!
Last night the gorgeous Michelle Obama was on Jay Leno’s show for his new 10 questions segment. The first lady was gracious and funny and not only kept up with Leno, but cracked better jokes than he’s made in decades. Michelle talked about a White Sox World Championship win vs. World Peace and how her husband is just as much of a pain in the ass as yours. Check it out above.
“The best thing that ever happened to me was being brought up hard. It’s kept me hungry, even though now I’ve got more than I ever thought I’d see in this lifetime. It doesn’t matter how much I accumulate — I’ll be starving for the rest of my life, that’s for damn sure. They say when opportunity knocks you should let it in and invite it to sit at your table. Fuck that — when opportunity knocks, you should take it captive. Beat that shit down. I’ve got opportunity tied to a chair in my basement with a ball gag in its mouth. Opportunity ain’t even thinking about leaving my house. If you keep quiet for a second, you’ll hear it whining.”
Demi Lovato rolled up to LAX yesterday to catch a flight and unlike a lot of celebs we see jetsetting, Demi actually is wearing the sort of thing you’d want to sit on a plane in. Uggs, leggings, a sweater jacket, no make up and holding a pillow. Perfect, right? That’s a lot more real that Victoria Beckham or Lady Gaga’s in-flight gear and definitely “just like us” and by us, I mostly mean me. I normally can’t even be bothered to fly with jeans on.
You all should know by now that Real Housewives of Atlanta is one of my favorite things about living on earth in present times, so you know I gotta check out every spoof that comes out. This one that’s up on Funny or Die now is pretty great. Amy Phillips does her impression of the queen of function punctuality, Kim Zolciak and explains how her culty hit “Don’t Be Tardy For The Party” got off the ground. Not just that, but other celebrities come in to the booth to help her out. I won’t spoil it for you, but her Lady Gaga is quite funny.
She. Is. Marvelous. Seriously marvelous. And super gorgeous. I am not generally a fan of short hair, on guys or girls (late ’90s men’s fashion was a nightmare for me, and I was only in middle school), but she looks so...
I would like to tell you that the term “retard” is very offensive to me. I am not offended because I ASSUME it would offend someone who has mental retardation. I am offened on how the word came to...
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