Perhaps this is just what Sean Penn and Robin Wright need to get off the I love you/I hate you/I love you/I hate you roller coaster.  Sean has a new girlfriend — they met last month at Kid Rock’s house so you know it’s destined to last forever and ever — and she’s every estranged wife’s nightmare.

She’s a 2003 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition model, she’s appeared in Jay-Z, John Legend and Robin Thicke videos.  She was seen on The T.O. Show when she was dating Terrell Owens and she has a contract with Maybelline.  Did I mention she’s half Sean’s age?

One of People’s unnamed sources said, “They are together all the time.  They are pretty serious together. She wants to get serious with him and it seems like he is really into her too.”  He’s got money and fame, she’s got 25-year-old tits — everybody wins.

Who needs food when you have coke and fingernails to keep you sustained?  Lindsay and her exposed torso were trolling around Manhattan last night because, after all, it is Fashion Week and she is a well-respected designer.

And in case you are still wondering why LL is always doing that stupid pose, the answer is in the gallery.

Taylor Swift was a guest on The View today — incidentally, Kate Gosselin sucks as a guest host — and the harpies wasted no time asking her about the whole VMA debacle.  I’m so glad she got a chance to let everyone know that Kanye hasn’t even contacted her yet.

It’s kind of old news in this Autumn of Anger, but Kanye sure has a lot of time to blog apologies and talk to Leno about being a dickwad, why not call the girl, apologize and move on?  He’s more interested in restoring his public image — and it sucked to begin with — than actually connecting with someone he hurt and making it right.  I’ve said it before, I’ll say it now, and I assume I’ll be saying it again:  Fuck you, Kanye.

It’s not coming out until February, but here’s the trailer for Takers.  On the surface it just seems like another testosterone-fueled blockbuster, but it’s really so much more:  one of the stars is Chris Brown.

America has a short memory and this flick isn’t releasing until next year.  I predict that, good plot or bad, this movie will make hundreds of millions of dollars and Chris Brown will be back on top.

Jessica Simpson took to her Twitter yesterday to let everyone know that she was searching after her Malti-Poo Daisy, a gift from ex-husband Nick Lachey, was snatched away by a coyote.  ”My heart is broken because a coyote took my precious Daisy right in front of our eyes. HORROR! We are searching. Hoping. Please help!”

Aw, this is so sad.  Daisy is that cute little puff ball that Jessica is usually seen traveling with.  One minute she was hanging out in her Louis Vuitton pet carrier and the next … well, never mind.

Coyotes are a real problem in lots of areas.  Here in Massachusetts they are so displaced thanks to all the new housing developments that have encroached upon their territory — we have had coyotes walk right across our yard — yet it doesn’t seem fair to thin them out either.

I tuned in last night, along with more than 10 million other people, to check out Leno’s new late-night talk show that doesn’t air late-night.  It feels different to have that program format airing before the 11 o’clock news and I wanted to see how it would translate.  I’m lying — I wanted to see what Kanye had to say.  And, you know, I had a tough day yesterday.  I not only had to compliment Beyonce, I had to write about Oprah twice and watch her show yesterday.  I was really looking forward to just chilling out and escaping the stress of my day.  I never expected that Oprah’s huge cranium would be looming before me in a matter of moments, but it was.  I can’t escape that bitch.

Here’s the thing:  I was never a Leno follower, but his “new” show looks and feels almost exactly like his old show.  Jokes?  Still not funny.  Set?  Circa 1989.  Desk?  Gone.  Headlines?  At the end of the show. Don’t believe me?  You can watch the entire episode above.  Adrienne Curry Tweeted that she thought the Obama interview skit was “brilliant”.  Brilliant!

Basically, Leno just wasn’t ready to give up his show so they moved it to 10 o’clock, shuffled some furniture around, and called it “new”.  It makes me wonder — how pissed do you think Conan is?  He waited all those years for Leno to vacate the 11:30 spot as was the agreement, and now he’s still standing in the shadow of Jay Leno’s chin.

The success or failure of this show can never be determined on a premiere night.  People are curious, so they’ll watch for now.  The success of Leno won’t be known until the honeymoon is over.