Elisabeth Hasselbeck has finally given birth to her third child with husband Tim, another son, named Isaiah.

Hasselbeck, who’s seemingly been pregnant for the last five years, welcomed her newest edition with her husband of seven years yesterday in New York City. “Elisabeth and Isaiah are doing great and we’re excited about the addition of another baby boy into our family”, Tim said in an interview that was later publshed on the ABC blog.

While I suppose I can’t cause too much fuss over a baby, I do find it somewhat bittersweet that there’s another member of one America’s most outspoken right-wing familiies. I can only imagine that this baby is nestled in his crib under an Anne Coulter mobile and that his first word will have something to do with second amendment rights.

There have been some pretty hilarious porn spoofs of beloved television staples over the years, including The Brady Bunch and more recently an I Love Lucy-themed video, and now we have another to add on to that list: TMZ.

These video previews, which don’t include any actual sex but do include a fair bit of foul language (so NSFW! We warned you!), are just straight-up silly parodies of people like Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo, Lindsay Lohan and Eminem, Heidi and Spencer and other couples and partners we’d expect the porn world to put together for us.

And as for everything else, well, I’m not exactly sure how to critique something I know is a porno. The acting is what you’d expect. There are a couple times when I believed that the actors were improvising but trying to remember buzz words and key phrases which is good for a laugh. The blond guy who plays the “surfer dude” from the TMZ bullpen is actually pretty hilarious. He should win an AVN Award or at least be able to move on to commercial work or something.

Ehhh… maybe just watch it.

Look you guys! Jon Gosselin is FIGHTING FIRE WITH FIRE by TAKING PHOTOS OF THE PAPARAZZI. Oh my God they HATE it when you do that. It gets them SO RILED UP. I mean, the resultant photos are FUCKING GOLD to them, which is SO ANNOYING. Oh, Jon. You are such a witty man.

I want to know more about the friend towering over Jon, making him look like the long-lost Little Rascal. I have such a weird thing for guys with shaved heads — especially when they’ve obviously shaved their heads because they’re balding. I feel like those guys try harder in the bedroom, because they know that, deep down, they don’t have any hair.

I guess this isn’t just a date or two — Renee Zellweger and Hangover hottie Bradley Cooper were spotted arriving at the airport together in Spain, where they were picked up and whisked off by a waiting car. A Spanish holiday already? Dayum. But maybe that’s not such a big deal when you’re ridiculously rich and famous and needing to put as much distance as possible between yourself and Jennifer Aniston.

I hate to break this to Wendie, but it looks like Mischa Barton might soon be off limits again.

Friends of the actress fear that she’s returned to work too soon after leaving the hospital and speculate that she’s on the verge of another, possibly more serious, breakdown. According to one friend, Mischa is “just not herself,” and another reports that she often “cries for no reason.”

Barton returned to the set of her new TV series The Beautiful Life a mere two days after being released from the hospital. She was involuntarily admitted after friends reported concerns that she was contemplating suicide.

All cattiness aside, it seems as if she’s been teetering on the edge for a while now and it won’t take much for her to stumble over that final step. Although she definitely looks better in the photo above (taken August 2nd) looks can be deceiving. Two days after a hospital release is just not enough time to safely recover.

It’s red carpet time! Or, I guess in this case, it’s green carpet time. Young Hollywood turned out in droves for Sunday night’s Teen Choice Awards. I don’t know who won what award because I’m not a teen, and it’s not my choice. I chose to watch football. But I do enjoy seeing who wore what to the awards show.

The green carpet was shot outside, in natural light– something for which Beet always cuts celebs a little extra slack. But not me. Because its the same light that all of us have to live every day of our lives in. So when a celeb shows up on the red carpet in natural light that reveals their haggard eye bags and pancake makeup, I feel highly vindicated. Case in point: Amanda Bynes (above). I’m not sure what kinds of bottles she’s been hitting, or how often, but I’m convinced that bottles are definitely being hit.

I’m also convinced that inside Rumer Willis’ gullet is a pelican desperately struggling to swallow a fish.

Britney Spears, on the other hand, looked fabulous. I’ve never been a big fan of her fashion choices, but her dress tonight was sexy with a touch of  class.

Miley Cyrus showed up in an outfit that may have been made up of pieces from her Wal-mart line. I have nothing against Wal-mart, and definitely nothing against Miley, but I’m not so sure that was the best fashion choice for an awards show. Nothing says tacky like a darkly colored bra showing through a wife beater.

Other atendees included Robert Pattinson, looking drugged and disheveled as ever, Kristen Bell in my least favorite celeb fashion trend of the last few years (a jumpsuit), the Jonas Brothers, Fergie, Emma Roberts, Jordin Sparks, Kristen Stewart, Alexis Bledel, Ashley Tisdale, Selena Gomez, and Kat Von D.

So who had your favorite look of the evening? Worst?