I fully admit to watching all installments of Real Housewives on Bravo. 

Lots of stuff has been going on with the New York housewives.  Bethenny, the funny underfed one, just got engaged to real estate dude Jason Hoppy.  I didn’t know she even had a boyfriend, but I totally hope she asks Kelly Bensimon to be in her wedding.

Also, Page Six reports that the Countess — you may remember that she was Dis-counted by her husband this spring – may be getting back together with her wayward spouse.  I guess things didn’t work out with his Princess girlfriend.

All the housewives, save Kelly — the most hated of the bunch — are embroiled in contract negotiations for Season 3.  Listen, every single one of these attention whores will be back.  Mark.  My.  Words.

Brit spent some time with her sons Jayden James and Sean Preston in Paris, France yesterday.  I don’t know what it is but with the brunette hair and the boob almost popping out of her shirt as she strolled under the Eiffel Tower reminds me of old crazy Britney.  Let’s hope it’s just the dye job that’s throwing me off.

The kids are cute but that nanny in the background looks like whatever they’re paying her isn’t enough.

Emma Watson, now legal at 19, accidentally flashed the crowds today at the Harry Potter premiere in London.  On a slow news day, this picture would be plastered all over the Internet.  It’s a pretty brilliant move to provide an upskirt (?) on the day of Michael Jackson’s funeral.  So little of the public will ever know that Emma Watson does, in fact, wear undies because we’re all so fixated on the real location of Michael Jackson’s corpse.

Jennifer Hudson performed today at Michael Jackson’s memorial service.  Here she is backstage with Usher casually resting his hand on her belly.

Now I know what people mean when they refer to that pregnant glow — I certainly never had it, but Jennifer looks beautiful and healthy!

In a year that has brought so much loss to Hudson, I’m excited for her impending arrival.  She’ll never know so deep a love as the one she will have for this little tot.

I didn’t watch Michael’s memorial service, but I did have it playing on a minimized window on my computer.  So, I heard Mariah Carey sing poorly — was it because of emotion or was she just bad?.  I also heard Al Sharpton with his totally inappropriate “Wasn’t nothing strange about your daddy,” speech and did I hear some politician talking about laws or the Constitution, or something like that?  What the hell was that about?

Well, the funeral is over.  Now things can return to normal and we should only have stories to report about the battle over Michael’s estate and kids for the next eight to ten years, or so.

Above, a clip from really the most heart-rending part of the service.  Michael’s daughter, Paris made a brief statement.

Michael Bay, better known as the director of The Transformers movies, has an interesting way of auditioning leading ladies.  Back when he was casting for the first film in the franchise, he had Megan Fox wash his Ferrari.  At his house.  And he filmed it.  And now has no idea where the tape is.  “Wash a Ferrari.”  Is that what they call sex tapes nowadays?

Anyway, regardless of the backseat of a Ferrari casting couch relationship between these two, Bay spoke out earlier this week about what an idiot he thinks Fox is.  In response to Megan’s public assertions that Bay relied too heavily on special effects for the Transformers movies, he said,  ”She says some very ridiculous things because she’s 23 years old, and she still has a lot of growing up to do.  You roll your eyes when you see statements like that and think, ‘Okay Megan, you can do whatever you want.’  Nobody in the world knew about Megan Fox until I found her and put her in ‘Transformers.  I like to think that I’ve had some luck in building actors’ careers with my films.”