Is everyone SO EXCITED for the bloody mess that will (hopefully!) be the return of Jon & Kate Plus 8 to TLC on Monday? I KNOW I AM. There’s a preview clip from E! above. Do you LOVE the body language or WHAT??

Says the President of TLC: ““You’ll see Jon struggle in the kitchen trying to make pizza for his kids. You’ll see what its like when Kate has to put a tent up for the first time for her kids, who love to camp in their backyard. And she gets a little advice from her daughter who doesn’t think she does it quite as well as dad.”

And as to whether or not we’ll get to see Jon running around Manhattan with his new barely-legal harem? “As far as new people and places that may be cycling into Jon and Kate’s lives, we’re taking it on a case-by-case basis,” she says.

Ooooh, don’t let us down, TLC!! DRAMA! DRAMA! DRAMA.

Ciara was at Nobu last night for the TXT L8TR campaign sponsored by Express, wearing what can only be described as a bow-xedo.  What do you think of this red, satin, strapless … thing?  I’m in total support of banning texting while driving, but what action can we take to ban bad pantsuits and dyed-to-match pumps?

The Hilton sisters were there, as well as America’s and Beet’s favorite, Mandy Moore.  Beet, I put an extra pic of Mands in the gallery — no need to thank me.   Kellan Lutz, Oliva Wilde, Josie Maran and the perpetually pregnant girlfriend of Matthew McConaughey, Camila Alves, also made a showing. 

I really felt that Kara was going to be gone.  After last season, when the world realized that American Idol with four judges makes no sense, I thought she’d be out the door.  Anyway, isn’t she really bad?  I tuned in once and she was trying to teach a contestant the right way to sing — awkward!  But her contract has been renewed and this scares me.  It makes me wonder if they truly aren’t bringing back Paula.

I don’t really watch AI unless I’m beyond bored and I suspect the world is coming to an end, but with Paula off the show, what would be the motivation to ever tune in?  Ryan Seacrest continuing that “straight man” routine?  I guess that is pretty entertaining, now that I think about it …

Britney was seen — where else? — at a Starbucks drive-thru yesterday in L.A.  I was a little worried a few weeks ago when she went back to the crazy hair, but here she looks healthy, normal, and really pretty even with no makeup on!

Keep it up, Brit!  In another few months, you’ll be able to buy that Venti latte without your daddy’s permission!

According to TMZ, Debbie Rowe has resolved the issues regarding custody of her children with Michael Jackson.  You’ll love this — not a penny passed hands.  *coughbullshitcough*

Rowe will retain her parental rights — good move for later down the road when her bank balance gets a little low — and Katherine Jackson will be the children’s legal guardian.  As part of the agreement, Rowe requested the participation of a psychologist who will help integrate Debbie into the lives of her kids.  She will be on a visitation schedule with them, though no details on how much visitation.

Jude Law got some chick pregnant; she’s due this fall.  Her name hasn’t come out yet and they aren’t in a relationship, so it was probably a typical Jude Law conquest accomplished by a liberal application of Stoli and English charm (though, obviously lacking a liberal application of spermicide).

I started going through the photo agencies’ Jude Law pictures of the past year, looking for this mysterious female that is now impregnated with Law’s kid.  (Obviously, I think I’m Nancy Drew.)  I did find some pictures of him with a woman, and they just had that “look”.  You know the look, the one that says “We’ve swapped body fluids.”  They looked really intimate with their arms wrapped around each other and lots of eye-gazing.  I was pretty much convinced that I’d found her, until I realized that the chick he looked so enamored with was … his sister.

And scene.