As if you needed any more reasons to find Jennifer Love Hewitt annoying, she crashed boyfriend Jamie Kennedy’s 104.7 Johnjay and Rich Show radio interview so she could talk about — what else?- getting engaged.

A rumor has come out that Jamie and I supposedly got engaged,” she said after the two were spotted at a Las Vegas jewelry shop buying a small ring.

When her boyfriend heard the engagement reports, “the poor guy was on fire,” she went on. “He was like, ‘No, no, no. That’s not true!’”

Added the actress, “I was like, ‘God, would that be the worst thing in the world?! Excuse me, but just for a second, there’s a line of people who would probably be OK with that [rumor].’”

Kennedy said he didn’t mean to upset his girlfriend.

“The thing is, people asked me, ‘Are you engaged?’ And I just said, ‘No, not that the moment, I’d be a very lucky man,’” he said. “And she got mad at me!”

Kennedy then asked Hewitt for a proposal timeline.

Replied Hewitt, “A timeline? By this time next year, if we’re not planning something, then there’s a situation.”

Really, Jennifer?  I want pictures of the lines.  The lines of men who have no other life goal than to be married to you.  Maybe you should spend a bit less time living in your fantasy land and issuing ultimatums and a little more time trying to successfully participate in a dating relationship to begin with.  I mean, haven’t you been engaged, like, 50 times?

It’s been officially confirmedby Scott Aukerman, the head writer for the MTV Movie Awards:  The Bruno and Eminem bit was totally staged.  He wrote on his blog, “Yes, the Bruno/Eminem incident was staged. That’s all anyone wants to talk about, so let’s get it out of the way.  They rehearsed it at dress and yes, it went as far as it did on the live show then.  Okay, you can stop reading this blog now!”

I’ve witnessed so much debate and commentary on this over the past couple days since the broadcast.  A lot of people thought Em’s tantrum was the real deal.  People, Eminem has been subjected to far morerepulsive and offensive things than Sacha Baron Cohen’s testicles without storming out of the room;  he did date Mariah Carey, after all.

TMZ reports that Brandy has paid out a settlement to the two children of Awatef Aboudihaj, the woman who died when the singer plowed into the back of her car in 2006.  They will each receive $300,000 a piece, however the victim’s husband, Marouane Hdidou, has rejected the $600,000 portion of the offer that was made to compensate him for his loss. 

I wish the Hdidou realized that $600,000 won’t bring back his wife but neither will $6M.  May he find peace, accept an offer and a way to move forward.

Lindsay Lohan is slowly but surely destroying every aspect of the entertainment industry.  Movies?  Check.  Music?  Check.  Now she’s got her bloodshot eyes focused on fashion.  And let’s face it:  Lindsay Lohan’s involvement with anything usually equals catastrophe.  She’s the opposite of King Midas…everything she touches turns to failure. 

Linds is in talks with House of Emanuel Ungaro about coming on board as a creative consultant.  And I ask:  would you accept creative consultation from someone who only wears leggings and flannel shirts?  Because if that’s all it takes, I was totally qualified for this job back in 1992.  Unless the “creative consultant” is the one who scores all the best coke for the office staff, in which she is definitely the right ho for the job.

It’s a totally insane concept — Linds being employed, and all – but I do feel an immense sense of relief that Ungaro’s head designer, Esteban Cortazar is threatening to leave and take his team with him if this coke-fueled union — all unions involving LL involve coke – between Ungaro and Lindsay happens.

Ungaro, I beg you not to do this.  You’re a 41 year-old label; you’re too young to die.

Ah, it’s the commentary we’ve all been waiting for.  Octo-Mom finally speaks out about what a totalfamewhore Kate Gosselin is.  There is nothing so ironic as one clown car uterus criticizing another clown car uterus.  You can see the video here and it’s really worth watching if only to see Octo say “Histreeeeooonic….histreeeeoooonic…..histreeeeooooonic.”  I’m more convinced than ever that Nadya Suleman’s best retort while under attack consists of some version of, “I know you are, but what am I?”

Octo-Mom is looking pretty good these days.  I can’t believe I’m saying that, but it’s true.

I’d like to talk about everything I missed out on last night. 

I missed out on Conan’s Tonight Show debut because I was too tired from watching two hours of I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here.  Incidentally, that show (IACGMOOH) is so horrible, it’s on four nights this week, and really needs to be renamed I’m An Innocent Citizen…I Don’t Deserve Such Poor Television Programming.  And even though I really wish that couple — the one we don’t discuss ’round these parts — would fall off the planet, I was reading an article about the suicide rate among reality TV contestants — I couldn’t believe the statistics.  So, whereas I don’t wish that fate upon them, if they did happen to trip on a coral snake, well, that would just be God’s plan, wouldn’t it?

Even worse than missing Conan was forgetting that Jon & Kate Plus 8 was on last night.  So while I was watching unknowns eat tarantulas I could have been watching Kate eat up some more publicity instead.  Devastating, really.