You guys, I went to an informational session today for The Delta Society. It’s an organization that takes animals into hospices, hospitals and other organizations to work with the ill and disabled. I heard a bunch of volunteers and staff talk about what a difference these animals make, and I was totally inspired, so I wanted to talk to you guys all about it. The Delta Society operates out of Washington and a bunch of other U.S. states, but if you guys know of other, similar organizations operating in other states please feel free to leave the info in the comments.

Leo makes an adorable — albeit non-compliant — cameo around the 1:40 mark. If you look closely, you can also see my cat Josie sitting perfectly still and staring at the corner, like I’m the freakin’ Blair Witch.

I only hate on you because you’ve achieved the life I dream of. I think you know that. At least you can have a sense of humor about it — unlike some celebrities. (Cough — Verne Troyer — cough. I know it’s you sending the hate mail. Your email address changes, but your IP doesn’t, buddy.)

Oh, and on the Verne Troyer front, his ex Ranae Shrider is looking for an assistant. Bedroom videography experience optional.

Someone’s not waiting for his “Yes, I’m Gay!” cover of People. Adam Lambert left a Hollywood club last night hand-in-hand with his boyfriend, Drake LaBry. (Real name or not? I’ll let you guys guess at that.)

Drake is very pretty, although personally I could do without the moustache. But I guess Adam’s into that!

I kind of like that Adam didn’t buy into all the hype about having to “clarify” his sexuality. Do heterosexuals have to go on the record saying that they’re straight? Of course not. You’ve never seen a “Yes I’m Hetero!” magazine cover featuring Paris Hilton grabbing Doug Reinhardt’s crotch. (Note to self: That would a funny Photoshop). Instead Adam is choosing to just living openly as a man who dates men, which is a very awesome alternative to making some big press stink about it like one’s sexual orientation needs to be justified to the press or to Perez Hilton.

Nine-year-old Noah Cyrus — yes, Miley’s little sister — and her friend Emily Reeves walked the red carpet at a recent Hollywood event wearing these.

The pedophile-enchanting twosome also have a YouTube show, just in case they weren’t — uh — exposed enough already.

Honestly, if I say the one on the right has chubby thighs, would that help ensure that she doesn’t wear anything like that on the red carpet for at least another decade? Because I will do it. Seriously I’m trying to save this girl’s life. This would be one thing if she were, say, going swimming, but WTF kind of parent lets their nine-year-old child on the red carpet dressed like this? I watch the search-engine traffic on this website, and it is very shocking how many people stumble in searching for something like “child porn” or “children naked” or “children sexy” or something equally disgusting and disturbing. (Of course none of that exists on this site, it’s just a strange feature of the way search engines work.) But, look, these people are out there looking for children to view sexually. I see them come in here every single day. At least put some pants on your pre-pubescent child before you put her on the red carpet.

I had to stop following Giuliana Rancic (nee DePandi) on Twitter. There are only so many tweets about beauty secrets and workout routines I can handle each day from someone who is naturally a size zero with perfect skin and married to the man who I always felt was destined for me.

But apparently Giuls’ life isn’t so perfect as it seems on the outset, as she is totally ready to throw away her marriage by doing a reality TV show with her husband of two years — but who’s counting? — Apprentice winner and total hottie Bill Rancic.

From building their Chicago dream home to hanging with each other’s outrageous families to wild weekends in Vegas, Giuliana and Bill are living life to the fullest as they embark on new adventures as husband and wife. And while living in two different places is not easy, they are committed to cell phone conversations and cross-country flights in order to make it work. Bill even gives learning the Italian language a shot in an effort to continue impressing Giuliana’s Italian family. But as with every couple there can be bumps in the road and Giuliana tries to relive her single days with a girls’ night out in Hollywood.

The series also offers a taste of what a day on the job is like for each of the Rancics. Viewers will follow Giuliana every step of the way from E! News morning meetings to behind-the-scenes access with some of today’s biggest celebrities to her frantic search for the perfect red carpet dress. Bill previously worked for Donald Trump following his win on “The Apprentice” but has since moved on. He is now developing real estate on his own and viewers will go inside Bill’s multi-million dollar construction projects. And when Giuliana decides that she wants a taste of Bill’s real estate world, hilarity ensues as Bill puts her to work on one of his construction crews for a day.

I will note, first off, that whenever the phrase “hilarity ensues” is used in an unironic sense, failure is imminent. But, truly, why do people keep signing up to destroy their marriages for a half-hour show on some third-rate network? The honeymoon period is over, Giuls. Putting this kind of strain on a relationship now is bad news bears. I don’t necessarily look forward to your forthcoming “divorce tips!” tweets, but I do look forward to my first date with Bill — off-camera, of course.

Bee-tee-dubs, kids, if you want to follow the EB crew on Twitter, you can check out me here, Wendie here and Kelly here.

We have a nation of people ignorant enough to think the marriage of a same-sex couple will somehow hurt existing children, who applaud the terrorist murder of a man who performed a medical procedure protected by our country’s laws, who were all-too-easily convinced by an army of mortgage brokers that they could magically buy twice the house they could reasonably afford, and, in the coup de grace, our young women are getting Paris Hilton’s autograph tattoed on their wrists.

From Paris’s Twitter: “So Sweet – One of my fans got the autograph I put on her wrist tattooed. Loves it! :) You Rock Girl”

Um, no. You don’t rock, girl. You are a part of the problem.