Hugh Grant was walking down a street in New York City last night and chit-chatting with some TMZ dudes.  Someone asked the actor what he’s been up to lately and he replied with a laugh, “wanking off on the Internet.”  It all seemed like a friendly exchange, until he got a bit of advice on the best location to hail a cab.

One of the paps had the unmitigated gall to tell Hugh that he might have better luck finding a taxi if he went in the opposite direction of where he was headed, at which point Hugh thanked him and then kicked a cameraman in the nuggets. 

It’s really weird video that you can see here.  I’m hugely impressed by the pap seen right at the end of the video who is so close to Grant and isn’t wearing a cup.

Now, it’s all speculation, but I’ve always thought that Hugh Grant was in the closet.  Maybe he didn’t want to be caught on film with his, uh, dinner companion.

Transformersactor Shia LaBeouf is one troubled dude.  He’s talked before about his non-conventional upbringing, but now is relating more details of his disturbing childhood.

He explains that his sense of humor comes from an inappropriate childhood of “seeing my parents have sex, smoke weed, my mom being naked … [and] twisted R-rated humor.”

And yeah, he may have issues, but apparently he’s in good company.  “The good actors are all screwed up. They’re all in pain. It’s a profession of bottom-feeders and heartbroken people.”  Honestly?  Thank God everyone in Hollywood is screwed up.  What would I do with my days?

Despite all the instability and substance abuse that surrounded him as a kid, he still hasn’t connected that to his own demons that he is struggling with.  “I have no answers to anything. None. Why am I an alcoholic? I haven’t a damn clue!”  Personally, I was just so relieved for Shia to admit that he’s an alcoholic.  It allows me to go to the safe place in my brain that assumes he was drunk when he talked about wanting to bang his mom.

Therapy, dude.  Therapy.  It will help work through so many of these issues that no kid should be saddled with.

Beyonce wrapped up her London tour with a duet performance of “If I Were A Boy” with George Michael. 

It was nice of George to take a hiatus from exposing himself in bathrooms and doing drugs in parks, and all, but I have to ask:  Does this version of “IIWAB” really sound that much better than the hoax recording of Beyonce from a few months ago?

You know what’s weird?  Brad Pitt was married to Jennifer Aniston who is estranged from her mother.  Now he’s with Angelina Jolie who is estranged from her father.  I’m sure there’s some deep psychological reason why Brad selects women who have dysfunctional parent relationships. 

And though I think people should try their hardest to maintain contact with family, I understand that it can’t always be worked out.  Today, I am understanding the rift between Angelina and her father a whole lot more than I did before. 

If you’re at work, and staying awake is a requirement, you may not want to watch eight plus minutes of Jon Voight, on C-span no less.  Oy.  Let me give you the highlight:  Voight called for an end to “this false prophet Obama.”  People are mad and some bloggers are even implying that the bloated actor was calling for Barack’s assassination.  I may not personally agree with Jon Voight’s politics, and I may personally think that he sounds a bit nuts, but I don’t think he was talking about murder…just about the 2010 election.  What say you?

I’m really not in the mood for this crap today, but I just heard that Arnie is looking to Terminate — sorry, it’s out of my system now — books from the California school system.  Yeah, textbooks are really expensive to buy and California has no money, and yeah, millions of trees would be saved, but it’s so hard for me to think of kids doing all their reading online; I don’t do well with change.  I blame the Kindle for this.

Arnold’s reasoning for this change is compassionate.  “A world of up-to-date information fits easily into their pockets and on to their computer screens. So why are California’s public school students still forced to lug around antiquated, heavy, expensive text books?” 

Well if we weren’t the fattest nation in the world already, this should certainly seal the deal.  I know that technology leads to progression, but I still can’t get over the fact that our leaders of tomorrow won’t be getting scoliosis from lugging 30 pounds of crap around in a JanSport book bag.  Times are changing so much.

No longer just a scary rumor, Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Bassett have confirmed that they are expecting a human being.

Personally, I think their timing is very fortuitous.  I mean, how many episodes of Kendra, featuring just Kendra, can people tolerate?  She needs a comic foil, and thanks to some determined sperm, will have one in about six months. 

Next season on Kendra expect lots of diaper mishaps, puke references, sleepless nights, and day drinking.  Welcome to motherhood!