Haylie Duff, which some of you know as the older sibling to Hilary and some of you know as the famous girl who doesn’t actually do anything, obviously had plastic surgery.  She had her nose modified and upturned and had her chin reduced.  No word on if she had her sister’s coattails surgically removed from her firm grasp at the same time.

Christie Brinkley is past the phase of dating really young dudes but she has John Mayer in her sites as the perfect match for her daughter — the one she had with Billy Joel, as if you couldn’t tell — Alexa Ray Joel.  Personally, I don’t think anyone with four divorces under their belt should be fixing people up, and I really don’t think anyone should be fixing up a loved one with John Mayer.

John Mayer has a history of not committing, talking to the media about his relationships in graphic detail, and being addicted to Twitter — and then there’s his music. 

Which really begs the question:  Why does Christie Brinkley hate her daughter?

Listen, I don’t dedicate a lot of time to wondering about the sexual orientation of Adam Lambert.  Partially because it has nothing to do with his talent, but mostly because I assumed he was gay based on these pictures of him making out with a dude.  Really, who cares?

Apparently, Lambert thinks we all do.  In an interview with People, he played coy when asked about his sexuality.  “Calm down and keep speculating.”  I must ask, where are all these frenzied speculators?  He was also asked if he addresses his sexuality in an upcoming Rolling Stone interview to which he replied, “Maybe.”  Obviously he’s taking PR tips from either Jodie Foster, Ricky Martin or Queen Latifah.

Adam talked about how cool it is to be different.  “Conforming is not cool.  Embracing who you are and what makes you different is actually what’s really cool … The kids that are different and out there and expressive and are bold with those choices, those are the people that grow up to be people we all want to hang out with, that become celebrities or become really successful in what they do because they believe in who they are.”

So when the “Yes, I’m Gay” People magazine cover comes out, who will be shocked?  And more importantly, who will care?

Nothing makes me happier than drunken Janice Dickinson footage. America’s first supermodel appeared on Finland’s version of Next Top Model and I have to tell you, it is worth watching.

Though the entire video of Janice insulting the models is entertaining, the real action on Part 1 starts at the four minute mark when Janice starts downing glasses of red wine and then falls down a flight of stairs.  I’m not kidding you, the models all just peer over the banister and stare at her sprawled out on the floor!  And I totally plan to use my favorite line, “You stupid models!” all. day. long.  I’ve screamed it at my kids a couple of times already.

Part 2 is the apology. Janice explains to the models that she got confused when taking her vitamin supplement and took a sleeping pill by mistake.  That, coupled with champagne (?), caused a reaction.  She also regales them with tales of other high-profile drunken incidents in her career.  Oh, the laughter!

I’d like to offer Janice a helpful hint to avoid future mishaps. Probably the most notable difference between a Vitamin C tablet and cocaine your “sleeping aid” is that you don’t cut Vitamin C with a razor on a mirror.

After getting to finally preview Brooke Hogan’s newest album cover the other night, I’ve just been dying to hear some of the music from this masterpiece. My wait is over.

In the spirit of friendship, I strongly caution you to listen to the intelligently named “Hey Yo” on an empty stomach.  Honestly?  It’s actually not as horrible as I hoped but I think what makes it so undesireable is in knowing that it’s Brooke Hogan — or BroHo, as I like to call her — singing. If I heard it on the radio and was blissfully unaware of the artist, I probably wouldn’t drive off the road. Yes, that’s my review of this song: it doesn’t make me want to drive off the road.

Wassamatter, Linds? La Lohan looked a little grumpy and disheveled as she left Samantha Ronson’s house on Wednesday. Sam just got back from a trip DJing overseas. I guess the reunion didn’t go as expected?

After walking out the gates, Lindsay poured her tiny, tiny self into what appears to be some manner of bullet-proof Rolls Royce. Rough life.