Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson exhaust me.  I read these stories of them fighting and crying and screaming and it makes me have to take a nap.  It’s just such a high level of drama all the time.

The newest altercation was at Prive nightclub when Sam left without Lindsay.  You do not leave your celebulez at the club.  Please click here to watch the video, complete with Linds telling security, “She left?  She left?  Get my fucking keys now!”

I wonder if Linds drank Coke at Prive?  Or maybe a hot coffee with Sweet & Blow.  Perhaps this tantrum is just for the cameras and she’s method acting.  Ack…I’m out of thinly veiled drug references.  These two are so fucked up.

Surely you remember, it was only two weeks ago, that Jennifer Aniston didn’t want to discuss her marriage with Brad Pitt?  You know, the marriage that ended years ago.

Now Jen is doing promo work for Marley & Me in the UK and talked with Hello! magazine:

You were with Brad Pitt for seven years – and married for five. It must have been very intense, in the public eye? [sic]
“It was. But I don’t regret any of that time with Brad and I’m not here to beat myself up about it. They were seven very intense years together, and it was a beautiful and complicated relationship. I will love Brad for the rest of my life – you can’t take away good memories. I really do hope that we’ll be good friends again at some point. You can survive anything – human endurance is unbelievable. But yes, it’s sad coming to the end of something special. You try to avoid all the pain but that somehow causes even more. I’m a human being, have human experiences.”

I know Jen says that humans are durable and can survive anything but I really do not know if I can overcome one more fucking interview about her marriage that lasted four and a half years, has been over for four years, and is still the only topic she has to talk about.

As you all know, the big fight that exploded between Rihanna and Chris Brown was over a text message.  Chris was texting with another woman about hooking up.  Now, we know who the other woman is-and it’s kind of creepy.

According to TMZ, the other half of the texting duo is forty-year-old Tina Davis, Chris Brown’s manager.  There have been rumors that she and Chris had a relationship three years ago when he was sixteen.  Thinking back to the one sixteen-year-old I’ve ever had sex with, why would anyone voluntarily sign up for that shit in their late thirties?

This video is a couple of years old; I originally put it up so we could see this chick in action.  When I watched it, and I really had no intention of watching seven minutes of this former Def Jam A&R exec, I was kind of cracking up.  It’s so funny how it the video shows her trying to be all high-powered with her “This track is too west coast, annoying.  Rewrite!” juxtaposed with footage of her painting her fingernails like a stereotypical ditzy 1950′s secretary.

I haven’t been very consistent with the Daily Lohan posts lately, and I sincerely apologize for that. You guys deserve better! But it’s partially Lindsay’s fault, too, because she hasn’t been out doing “candid” photo shoots every day like she usually does.

Now I see why — she’s been very busy working on her new line of spray tans! It’s called Sevin Nyne, and now I have this new theory that Lindsay Lohan keeps naming her product lines as numbers because she’s clearly a terrible speller. Lindsay appears in the ads for the products, shown above.

“As much as I love the sun,” she says, “it is so bad for your skin. I have tried every product on the market and never found something that I loved.” Until, that is, she met spray tanner Lorit Simon. “She had an amazing tanning formula that over the years we continued to perfect,” Lindsay reveals of the partnership. “It was important to me to have a natural product that didn’t have a lot of dyes and chemicals. Our product has goji berry extract which has antioxidant properties, it has a natural golden color, it doesn’t streak and smells delicious — not like a typical tanning product.” The $35 spray will become available exclusively in Sephora stores on the first of May — with an early web launch on Sephora.com on April 15.

My gut reaction is to rag on how shitty this line is going to do, but ya know what? Her stupid line of overpriced leggings sold like wildfire, even as the economy crumbled to pieces. And I will admit that I’m someone who purchases products like this in tanning salons, and $35 is a reasonable price if it really does work well and smell delicious. The stuff I use is $50 a bottle and smells like ass, but, then again, it doesn’t turn my face the weird shade of orange that Lindsay’s rocking in the top pic. (Plus it locks in makeup!) Still, I think this shit will fly off the shelves.

Britney Spears shows the paparazzi what she’s working with, lounging at the pool at a Miami hotel on a day off from her tour.

And, yes, OF COURSE we have an ass close-up in the thumbnails. What? You thought we wouldn’t?

There’s also a bunch of other photos of her chillin’ on a deck chair. She looks good and she’s sipping water, although it wouldn’t kill her to put on a little more sunscreen — she’s super scorched! It’s also very cute how she keeps her pack of Marlboros right next to the diaper bag. But, ya know what? All things considered, I’m very proud of Britney right now. Props, girl.

Awwww, my precious Taylor Swift!

Everything she touches turns to gold!

CSI usually loses out in the Sunday-night ratings battle against Desperate Housewives and Lost, at least with an audience who hasn’t quite hit retirement age. But with Taylor Swift starring in a guest role last week? It showed up as the night’s top scripted show among adults 18-49, and the top scripted show among women 18-34.

Clip above.

What do we think of Taylor’s big acting debut, kids? (She’s cute, and she’s not terrible, but personally I think she oughtta stick to singing.)