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Catholicism had a busy news week, which is interesting because that whole religious zombie shindig isn’t for a few weeks yet.
In addition to being pissed at the Detroit Tigers, and working on finally being able to marry into the hot, sexy genepool of British Royalty, they also made it possible for you to see the “Sexiest Swimsuit Model in the World” naked.
Reportedly, the most totally awesomest Pope of the last 100 years inspired swimsuit and lingerie model Joanna Krupa to pose nude. She tells Foxnews (of all places) that “…worrying about going topless in a photo shoot or film is really ridiculous… the fact is Pope John Paul said, since we were born naked, it is art, and it’s just showing a beautiful body that God created.”
God says, “You’re welcome.”
How does that proverb go? Ask, and she will take off her clothes for you?
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45 Responses to “She Also Believes in a Second Coming”
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God bless her!!!!
*wipes tear from eye*
Ahaha, I call it “Happy Jesus Turned Into a Zombie Day” too!
Tee hee. Kelly: loving your work! This is very funny.
http://www.biblicalproportions.com/modules/ol_bible/index.php/?search=Naked&operation=Search
They listened as the devil told man he was naked and God was not pleased.
Exodus
Exodus 20:26 Neither shalt thou go up by steps unto mine altar, that thy nakedness be not discovered thereon.
Exodus 28:42 And thou shalt make them linen breeches to cover their nakedness; from the loins even unto the thighs they shall reach:
Exodus 32:25 And when Moses saw that the people were naked; (for Aaron had made them naked unto their shame among their enemies:)
Jesus did not turn into a zombie. He died for our sins so that we might have everlasting life. Please be respectful of other people’s religion even though you might think its bs.
are you serious?
but then he came back. you know, like a zombie. At least that’s what they taught me in Catholic school.
Not for nuthin’, Kelly, but my parent’s sacrificed a small fortune sending myself and my siblings through 12 years of Catholic school. Not to mention a whole life time of living by example. Therefore, being a thoroughly-trained and practicing Catholic, I feel jusitifed in commenting on this post and, in particular, the “zombie shindig” comment.
Good One! That was priceless!! The Tigers, Royalty, Nudity…a Tri-fector of funny at our expense. BAM!
Yay! Another Catholic with a sense of humor! (Sometimes I worry I’m the only one).
oh Kelly, you had me at zombie.
*stands and applauds*
Kelly = Unfunny. Making my head splode.
as a Catholic
I don’t remember the Pope saying that
but if it suits her
she can undress with no alibi at all anyway
I’m pretty laid back about religion and stuff but I really think you were rude about your comment. One thing I live by is live and let live and that includes respecting other people’s beliefs even if I don’t agree with them. You can be funny and still respect religious beliefs.
I mean, come on… there’s nothing disrespectful about what she said. Technically, Jesus supposedly rose from the dead which is exactly what one must do to become a Zombie. Maybe it sounds more offensive calling him one, but people should take into consideration that everybody’s favorite Lord & Savior appeared to be a good Zombie, not an evil one.
supposedly the reason zombies can function is because of an infection that somehow controls their nervous system. sooooo it’s not the same.
this is an odd argument, since zombies AREN’T REAL
Or, ARE THEY??!!
Paging George Romero, George Romero to the service desk!
Haha! Too funny Lynn ;)
Thx, P-L-M. You’re the only one who got it!
I’m as liberal as you can be, I’m pro choice, pro gay marriage and everything else so don’t accuse me of being a right wing conservative nut, but I think she was disrespecting what is an important religious holiday to some.
well if you were as liberal as you can be, you would really just reflect on how great freedom of speech is, and nothing more
I love freedom of speech but you shouldn;t use it to trample on other people’s beliefs! Just because I don’t agree with Islam or Judaism doesn’t mean I’m going to call them names or disrespect their beliefs.
So you believe in freedom of speech, UNLESS it hurts someones feelings?
Liberal here as well, and not even a Catholic, but the “religious zombie shindig” is likely offensive to many, me included. If you want religious zealots to just live and let live, you should lead by example.
I agree – I found the zombie reference ugly and gratuitous. Here’s the thing – it has become somewhat fashionable to rank on Jesus and Christianity, and politically incorrect to do the same for other religions. Huge flaps if anyone makes fun of Mohammed (Muhammad – seen it spelled both ways), but no problem to do the same to the Christian deity. I cry foul…
rank?
From Dictionary.com See #19
–verb (used with object)
16. to arrange in ranks or in regular formation: The men were ranked according to height. He ranked the chess pieces on the board.
17. to assign to a particular position, station, class, etc.: She was ranked among the most admired citizens.
18. to outrank: The colonel ranks all other officers in the squadron.
19. Slang. to insult; criticize.
Kelly,
I never said YOU were ugly and gratuitous, or even criticized your writing. I happen to like your writing – if not, I never would post a comment. I wouldn’t care. I simply expressed my opinion that your point was well made without the Jesus/zombie reference. And yes, I agree there is a difference between disrespect and irreverence – but I think you need to know someone pretty well before you can tell which way they are going. We are just getting to know you – part of the learning curve.
New Baptist here. Perhaps it’s my lack of lifetime dedication to the religion, but I sure laughed out loud. That’s just plain funny.
Keep em coming Kelly.
hilarious. a real knee slapper. not. even. close.
it is the obligation of religious zealots, not us filthy heretics, to lead by example. we’re pretty much free to do whatever we want, since we’re burning in the core of the earth for eternity anyway.
if you want to be a really good christian, secure your place in the clouds, celebrity gossip may not how you should be spending your time anyway.
Jesus was not the son of god and mary, rather a gay werewolf and Dracula. Na na na boo boo. Shut up.
I agree with nyglory1 , you can be funny while still being respectful of religious beliefs. I mean, if I watch Bill Maher or something I know what I’m getting but on a gossip blog? Not the place I expect to read stuff like that. That line really threw me for a loop.
The annoying thing is that this story could have been told without the dumb zombie reference and everyone–even Catholics–would have found the humor in her quote. It seemed tacked on and even maybe mean-spirited.
And you’re the EXACT reason religious folk get a crazy rap. Are you freaking kidding here? You’re on a GOSSIP BLOG. Are you expecting respectful posts and tasteful responses? WTF?
For anyone to take this as far as you all have, and be “offended” by this, you’re taking yourselves way too seriously.
Do me a favor. Go read the link she posted about the Catholics angry over Opening Day being on Good Friday. That dude was obnoxious as hell, but summed it up perfectly. And I’ll take it one step further. The Church is simply pissed that on one of the biggest days of the year for people to show up, there will now be less of them contributing to the collection plate. They’re pissed that baseball “wins.” It’s all bullshit.
Unless you angry readers/posters are in church every single Sunday, not just the holy holidays, and truly live by the word of the Bible every day, then you’re complete hypocrites and are way off base being so offended.
Nah, you are jumping to conclusions. People who write in caps do idiotic stuff like that I’ve noticed…
I am not exactly a religious person but it’s weird that you assume I am. Now, I and others probably don’t see the point of bringing up religion on a gossip site. We are here to read snarky comments about silly people.
My point before your strawman hijack of my words was that she could have made a joke out of the post without the weird zombie thing. What that model said was pretty hilarious but the odd title was almost sensational in nature and uncalled for in my opinion.
It’s so sad that people get as angry as you have over someone simply thinking and reacting in a normal manner. The other post she wrote was fine and not offensive. It’s not like I or any of the other “angry” posters are having some knee-jerk religious reaction. We are simply just more level-headed–as is apparent in the difference in tone and diction between your comment and the other “angry” ones’ I’ve seen.
Ack, forgot to say that, no, nobody comes here expecting this blog to sound like Pride and Prejudice but most people who read this gossip site are familiar with the tone and general writing style it has and would know that this post was not really the norm.
My point about Maher was that he regularly brings up religion and tries to rile people up about controversial subject matter. I would argue that people who read Beet read her blog because it’s witty yet not as vicious and inane as other blogs out there (ha, I don’t think I would say it’s classy or anything but most regular readers probably know what I am talking about).
Wow…nice to see everyone has lost their sense of humor!! If you’re looking for PC humor go fucking read a different entertainment site. This whole bash the new person is getting so old. Grow up.
Whoa there, Skippy! Everyone is being pretty polite and simply commenting on the post- which is what (I’m assuming) Kelly, Wendie, and Sasha want us to do. No one started slinging around the f-bomb until you decided to put in your 2 cents. No one is bashing Kelly – I like her writing – but are just commenting on the more provocative parts of her post. We.are.allowed.
So – YOU grow up! (sticking out my tongue, singing “nyah nyah nyah nyah nah” while putting thumbs in ears and wiggling fingers)
I’m just stating my opinion. Which.I’m.allowed. As far as the f-bomb…that’s just how I talk…or type I guess. I was never a fan of Soliel but the bashing of her, I think, got out of hand. I’ve started to notice the same happening to Kelly…
I have no problem with Kelly and I’m sure she’s a good person or whatever but would she make fun of jews or muslims? I just don’t think so (Beet is jewish I believe) and I think all religions deserve respect. I wouldn’t be bothered if she made fun of the pope but the beliefs of the religion are something else.
What’s really ridiculous is her fucking statement… To use the pope and the religion to say such a thing.. That is stupid, this woman is stupid, and she is a whore anyway, she didn’t need inspiration to get naked, like we haven’t seen enough.
Isn’t freedom of speech AWESOME!? Someone can say something about a certain religion which others would regard as “insensitive”, and then those people can write bitchy comments about it saying this person SHOULDN’T be saying such things! COOL.
In most people’s defense, none of our comments were “bitchy” in my opinion. In truth, I was rather surprised by how level-headed and intelligent the posts I read were.
Now, we simply felt that she crossed a line. It’s sad that the relativistic nature of most people’s sense of freedom of speech hits upon circular logic like yours. As a long time beet reader I was simply caught off guard by this comment. I like the new writer but don’t remember any postings for the last year or so that are of this nature. It just didn’t seem to “fit” with the tone and history of this blog and many people simply noticed it.
Why reliogions deserve any special respect that others, say all these celebreties for example, don’t? why religious people always think that non-religious people have to respect them and not reverse?
I am a muslim by birth but I am not religious. The same respect you are demanding here is the kind of respect conservative minority groups of muslims demand for their belief and if it is not obeyed they will attack embasseys. It’s not different logic or mindset other than ” you should not talk your belief because it’s not in line with my belief and my belief is more important because my belief says so”. You are just trained to restrain yourself better but the thought framework is the same and I think it’s selfish.
oh yeah, I recognize her from Frederick’s of Hollywood catalogs! :P
Holy cow :|