Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Simpson Isn’t Fat-Just Stupid

jessicasimsponflub2-1

When I was in high school, I was a big fan of the band Heart.  Even when the dark-haired one got fat, I never really thought about it.  Because Heart was awesome-period.

There is all this media attention focused on the size of Jessica Simpson’s ass right now.  I can’t help but wonder:  would anyone even care about her pant size if she was super talented and was able to, oh, I don’t know-remember her lines?

Jessica played the last show on her “Bob Your Head” tour with Rascal Flatts, Saturday night in Irvine, California.  And screwed up her lyrics-repeatedly.  And this happens all the time!

Bottom line:  If I shell out money for a concert ticket, I’m a fan.  And if I’m a fan, I don’t care what you look like.  But I sure as hell do care if you are unprofessional, untalented and don’t know your own material.

With Jessica’s history, I think she should have to refund ten dollars of the ticket price to all audience members every time she fucks up a line.  Pretty soon, she’ll be paying to perform.

22 CommentsLeave a comment

  • since fucking when did female country singer translate into ‘dress like a messy slop that just rolled off the couch after a bender’?

    country fans should really be insulted.

  • i think it’s funny that she couldn’t make it as a pop singer so she’s like “oh i’ll sing country music…that’s easier…” lol. no! you have no talent no matter what you sing!

  • Jessica’s career has gone downhill since she left Nick. She’s lost her cosmetic line, the one with the edible products, and she’s lost an enourmous amount of respect from the public. Honestly, she’s NOT a very good singer, nor an enjoyable performer. She bobbles her head side to side and doesn’t have skilled stage presence.

  • Correct me if I’m wrong but I never really felt like Heart was trying to sell sex. Even before Ann Wilson got fat she wasn’t really a sex symbol, she was just an enormous talent. What a voice!

    Jessica Simpson never had talent; she has always just been a pretty girl who got a record deal.

    The difference is Heart never tried to sell sex, Simpson always has. You can’t have a career based on sex and then get fat and expect the fans to still love you. Doesn’t work that way.I guess someone should have explained that to Jessica before they passed the donut box.

    • If you look at the cover of Dreamboat Annie you can see where Heart is completely selling their sex appeal (hence my husband has the album hermetically sealed and makes me hold it over my face when we do it). But I totally agree that they aren’t “selling sex”, their talent negates the need. However, as my husband will point out excessively, it was certainly a bonus when he became a fan.

      Jessica Simpson, on the other hand, is a set of tits with a voice that’s the product of a recording studio sound engineer. Remove the studio and you only have a set of tits that can’t perform on stage, ya know, where it counts.

  • That’s why I love Eric Clapton. He comes out in on stage in jeans and sneakers, and makes some of the best music I’ve ever heard.

    Jessica’s shoe line is about the only thing worth paying attention to.

  • Jessica has always been stupid she is just showing her stupid to live audiences now!
    And Heart still ROCKS!!!

  • you know….she just fucking sucks. At least give us something awesome to look at if you can’t please us with your talent. (See katie perry) a bustier with white trash cut-offs and then top it all off with some flannel. Woo-Hoo!!! Yee Haw~!!! Somebody stab me in the eyes so i don’t have to be subjected to this hell.

  • I agree Wendie, LEARN YOUR LYRICS!
    WTF- this is your JOB Jessica.
    You can’t play an instrument,
    you (obviously) aren’t bright enough to write your own songs,
    you can’t act your way out of a paper bag,
    but you can at least learn the words to the songs you sing.
    There are dozens of truly talented girls out there willing to take your place.
    Dumbass.

  • i think jessica simpson is over rated she is a mockery in the music and movie business no one takes her serious. everyone thinks she is a dum blonde and that is how she got her fame it wasnt because of her music britney and christina dominated her in pop, after nick lachey she lost a lot of fans and became so hollywood, even her look was different no longer was she the cute innocent vrgin blond instead she dressed skanky had awful injection crap lips,and she dated any man that said they loved her…shes been around and one thing i do not respect is that she cheated with nick with bam margera even after he confessed to it as being true later on he denied it i wouldnt doubt it though that they banged. nick is the best she will ever get tony is using her he may care for her and im sure he loves her but he is boyfriend material and not husband material like she wants he will eventually leave carrie moved on for a reason she knew tony was a waste of time…jessica will always be the laughing stock of entertainment period. jessica simpson keeps on embarassing herself with her over exagerated twang, her flannel and stinky daisy dukes outfit…honey thats not country thats just straight out white trash…what a fake chick.

  • how many talented actresses have been torn to shreds for their weight, whether it’s too skinny or too heavy? too many to name. i don’t think talent makes a difference.

  • she’s notorious for forgetting lyrics. always has, probably always will. on a side note, she should have stayed with nick.

  • How do people know the lyrics to Jessica Simpson songs well enough to catch her forgetting them?

  • Heart still kicks ass. Magic Man …. no words, you all know how good that song is. But Heart has talent. And credibility.

    Why is there no Heart in Rock Band?