After being on leave since his January blow-job-fueled DUI, Charles Barkley will be returning to television coverage of the NBA, appearing on TNT’s Inside the NBA.
“From the beginning, Charles recognized that he used poor judgment. He took full responsibility and apologized for his actions,” Turner Sports president David Levy said in a statement. “We look forward to having him back in the studio.”
I think Barkley was an absolute riot about the whole thing, and I just adore the guy. What can I say? I’m an old-school Suns fan. I haven’t watched basketball since, like, ’95 or so, but damn were the Suns fun to follow when I was a kid growing up in Phoenix. So Barkley earned a soft spot in my heart, and I’m glad this worked out for him.
Although I asked my mom the other day, “Hey, Mom, when did Charles Barkley divorce his wife?” and my mom was like, “Uh, they’re still married.” So I’m sure Maureen Barkley is JUST DELIGHTED about all this talk about her husband getting a DUI on his way to a blow job.
“My game was very sexual. The main character was, like, a giant penis. It was like Mario Brothers, but the ghosts were, like, vaginas. Mind you, I’m 12 years old, and this is stuff 30-year-olds are programming. You’d have to draw in and program every little step—it literally took me all night to do a step, ’cause the penis, y’know, had little feet and eyes.”
Kanye West, discussing his young and hyper-sexual computer programming skeelz, during an interview with Details magazine in which he also claims he became successful because of his sex drive:
“People ask me a lot about my drive,” he says. “I think it comes from, like, having a sexual addiction at a really young age. Look at the drive that people have to get sex—to dress like this and get a haircut and be in the club in the freezing cold at 3 a.m., the places they go to pick up a girl. If you can focus the energy into something valuable, put that into work ethic…”
OK but seriously is it weird that I’m a little impressed that he wrote that game at the age of 12 and that I want to play it now? I used to write computer games at that age, too. And mine were really sexual as well. It was back in the early ’90s, and I’d write them for, like, DOS and the TI-82 calculator, and people would pass them all around my middle school and everyone loved them, and finally the teachers caught wind of it and I was told I had to delete all my games and not let anyone see them ever again.
And that’s why I had to become a celebrity gossip blogger instead of the next Bill Gates.
Thanks so much, repressive middle school authorities.
Eh, I’m gonna go easy on this dude, actually, despite the fact that he voluntarily put his penis inside Madonna recently.
Here’s Alex Rodriguez at a press conference, explaining how he wound up testing positive for performance-enhancing drugs in 2003.
I’ll tell you what strikes me about this: I think he wrote damn near every word of this statement himself. It’s not polished, it’s not perfect, there’s too much discussion of his cousin, etc, etc. It’s not something that a superstar athlete’s publicist would write. I think he insisted on writing this himself and reading his own words, not something that a professional had drafted for him. He wins a lot of points in my book for that.
Around the 4:25 mark, he says, “…and to my teammates,” and then pauses for 37 seconds before directly addressing Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, Mariano Rivera and Jorge Posada, all sitting in the front row. “Thank you,” he tells him quietly. It’s sincere.
A-Rod comes out on top here, I think, which is something he probably never got to do with Madonna.
Here’s Justin Timberlake, walking the runway with his co-designers at the William Rast show at NYFW. JT designs the line along with three other folks: his best friend from school days, Trace Ayala, Swedish designer Johan Lindeberg and Lindeberg’s Italian wife, Marcella.
The line is denim-heavy with a Wild West feel, and, so far, response to the show last night has been positive.
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