Today's Evil Beet Gossip

More Oscar Red Carpet Uh…Beauty. And I’ll Eat A Spider If Angelina Jolie Wears A Color In The Next Thirty Days

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Oh, Sophia Loren, time is a thief.  However, in the right lighting, and with a little distance on her, still a beauty.

Miley Cyrus-  I need your opinions on this girl because I feel conflicted.  Part of me feels like her dress contains the collective amount of embellishments that she should wear over the course of her entire career.

Angelina Jolie wore a black draped Elie Saab, old lady hair and general smugness.  However…emeralds on her ears.  Yes, those were real emeralds.  Holy shit!  As an aside, did you see her gaily laughing when Jennifer Aniston was onstage doing an uncomfortable bit with Jack Black?  Fakest.  Ever.

I’ve included a close up of Amy Adams necklace to ensure that you get me the right one.  It’s important that you know, for as long as I remain with Evil Beet, my every review of Anne Hathaway apparel is going to be the same:  beautiful from the neck down.  Lisa Rinna and Amanda Seyfreid dressed straight from the 1991 prom collection and, speaking of old, Penelope Cruz wore a dress that was sixty-years-old.  For real.

I thought Marisa Tomei’s dress was lovely and my favorite, Beyonce, looked like a gilded knockwurst.  Queen Latifah had full-body scoliosis and Robin Wright Penn deserves a mention since her husband didn’t during his Best Actor acceptance speech.  And Jessica Biel.  Someone, anyone, tell me why she played any role at the Oscars.  This is a command, not a question.  Other than her scintillating role as Mary Camden in 7th Heaven, what has she done?  Okay, maybe she’s done a few things but still, she’s famous by injection, isn’t she?

26 CommentsLeave a comment

  • did you also notice that Robin Wright tried to kiss him when he won and he basically just pulled away from her? That marriage is definitely over. Poor girl :(

    • Jenny, I totally caught that too!!! I was stunned. She seemed so proud of him and he was probably too lost in the moment to really care. I think he probably didn’t realize what he was doing… but still…. you and I and tons of other people totally saw it too! Sucks. His speech was awesome though.

      • Time to move on for Robin. She could do so much better. He is scum. She is still one of the most beautiful women in hollywood but she has been incredibly scared by Penn. Please let her be loved by someone who really cares.

  • @ Jenny

    no i didnt notice that- no good! i love robin Wright penn ( especially in Princess bride!!)- she should just leave the douchebag!!

    Live love love Marissa Tomeis gown!!

  • Jenny: yeah, i mentioned it to my fiance when it happened. =(

    Angelina looked great. And she didn’t look to be faking anything from where I was sitting, but I don’t know her. =S

  • when kate winselt won, she tried to either shake angie’s hand or grab her arm or something…but ang just kept on clapping with that condescending oscar perma grin.

  • Angie the black widow, is a skank ho! although this dress was much better than the one she wore too the Baftas!
    she used to be so beautiful, but now she’s too skinny ( which ages her), and she looks smug as a bug, yeah she’s got brad she can steal husbands, but does she have any female friends? how come we never ever see her with any females? there is a lot to be said about a woman who cant befriend oter women! alot!

    As for Jennier Beal- whats with the frumpy attire? she is way too hot to be dressing like that!

  • angelina: bad hair, and i didn’t like the earrings. altogether the look was too matronly for her.
    viola davis: i thought her gown was pretty but the wrong color on her. a jewel tone would have been great.
    penelope cruz: i thought she looked lovely.
    anne hathaway: lovely, but kind of boring.
    kate winslet: dress looks like a project runway competition that would get someone sent home. i liked her hair, though and her makeup was flawless.
    bridget fonda: awful, awful, awful.
    queen latifah: i thought she looked good.
    marisa: beautiful. i love her look.
    miley: hideous…still laughing at that dress.

  • Sorry, Queen Latifah is well on her way to being the next Aretha Franklin. She’s not a good looking woman.

  • I thought Angeline looked like Skeletore in drop earrings. Anne H. is trying too hard to channel Audrey Hepburn; speaking of vintage, Penelope Cruz knows how to work a throw back. She looked awesome. Marissa Tomei is too underrated and needs some serious props because she is gorgeous.

    Overall, my faves were Sarah Jessica and Penelope. My least faves were Beyonce with her wallpaper dress, and that awful thing Miley was wearing (were those dead fish scales or rotten petals?). Can someone please inform Miley that she is a teenager and not 52? And can that same someone inform Beyonce that when you are as voluptuous as her, smaller prints (or better yet solids) are better? Sheesh.

  • I thought miley’s dress was gorgeous. She looked beautiful in it too. A lot of people are going to think it’s ugly just because they don’t like her, and no matter what the poor girl does they will hate it. But that’s unavoidable in the world of gossip.
    And so it goes.

  • Those emeralds blew me away. At first I thought they were just cheap opaque green glass. But then I read they were 115 carat earrings (each???) and a 65 carat emerald ring. Very striking and different. Amy Adams necklace was beautiful. Goes great with her eyes and the red dress.

  • I hate that granola eating D-Bag Penn, I so wanted Mickey Rourke to win just to hear him say some crazy shit…

  • Angelina looks so Pompous at these things like we’re privledged just to see her appear. She needs a makeover ASAP too, sick of her wearing black with the old lady hair and makeup.

  • Brangela… Didn’t they look cute in matching black and darker hair as well. WOW! They must have had to do a lot of dope to not severly flinch when they didn’t win. Loved that bit of a twitch, tho’. Bet he gets whipped for a few days. Should we tell her that tacky statement tatoos on the over 30 crowd are way passe?
    Did Eastwood even show?? He must have been pissed at how she tanked that movie for him. Talk about overacting by over screaming.
    Maybe her next film can be the life of Octomom…or maybe ‘Eeek I am Octomom’
    Anyone else think mini-Penn(is) is trying to run for office, with the JFK hairdo? He might be better to try for an orifice, since he is one.

  • Angelina has lost her sex appeal — she’s too thin instead of voluptuous, her tattoos oddly look more and more like bruises, and her hair is way too matronly — but seems to still think she’s a vixen.

    Jen Aniston, meanwhile, wreaks of desperation — she’s a 40 year old woman who has no sense whatsoever that most 40-year-olds long ago left high school style and priorities (tanning, tanning, still obsessing over the hot boy that got away).

  • Miley – dazzling look on first glance, but all those little tier pieces of skirt look like ginormous fish scales. I can’t look at her without thinking “chicken of the sea”. Also, bless her soul, the scale (no pun intended) is all wrong – she’s a petite girl, and gets lost in this (way too grown-up) dress.

    Angelina – I usually like her, but it would be so nice to see her shake things up a little bit. Some color, some shape… something? Anything?!

    Beyonce – this dress employs every slimming trick in the book – black on the sides, slimmer silhouette on top; form-fitting with the sudden flare (same shape as several of the dresses, to be fair)… but the fabric – huh?! She’s a beautiful woman and looks great in solid colors with a little sparkle thrown in. This probably wasn’t her stylists’ best work, but it’s not that bad.

    And for the disclaimer – thank GOD I don’t have to face jillions of cameras and hope strangers don’t rip on me in the press. A to all of them for effort.