Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Phelpsy Update!


Despite Beets fervent denials, Phelps was indeed smoking massive amounts of sticky icky out of that gigantic bong. 


Olympic great Michael Phelps acknowledged “regrettable” behavior and “bad judgment” after a photo in a British newspaper Sunday showed him inhaling from a marijuana pipe.

In a statement released to The Associated Press, the swimmer who won a record eight gold medals at the Beijing Games did not dispute the authenticity of the exclusive picture published Sunday by the tabloid News of the World.

“I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment,” Phelps said. “I’m 23 years old and despite the successes I’ve had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again.”


On one hand I understand the big deal and on the other hand – what the fuck is the big deal? Phelps is a role model, sure. But he is also a 23 year old half dolphin herculean beast that has been locked in a watery prison for most of his young adulthood. Even dolphins like to get twisted and wild out every once in awhile. His mistake was letting someone take a picture of it. I don’t think Michael was really planning on continuing his swim career. In all the interviews I saw where he was asked about 2012 he didn’t seem overly enthused. How do you top 8 friggin Olympic Gold Medals anyway? In any case, I commend him on his bong choice. It looks very high tech and is obviously a quality piece. Hopefully the wacky tobaccy slowed down his superhuman sperm enough for he and Beet to bear mortal children.

38 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I couldn’t care less about Phelps per se, but I think it’ll be interesting whether or not the Olympic Committee actually upholds the new law saying that this kind of behavior can result in banning from the next Olympics. I suspect that because it’s Phelps, they’ll turn a blind eye but the next snowboarder, skier, or gymnast they catch will be skewered. And I’m sure he’s banking on that, too.

  • I think it’s lame that people are going ape-shit about it.
    I don’t know a single 23 year old who hasn’t hit up a bong.
    He just wasn’t very smart about getting his picture taken.
    Everyone fucks up.
    And, some celebs come back stronger once they’re messed up.
    I also want to bang him stupid.

  • lol i agree with lolly, you are a hoot. haha. phelps should be able to do whatever the hell he wants, he’s only 23 and he’s missed out on a lot because of his training/competing. this was probs one of the few times he did it and he just happened to be doing at the wrong place & at the wrong time.
    it happened to me before at college. thank god it’s a liberal arts school :)

  • “half dolphin herculean beast that has been locked in a watery prison for most of his young adulthood.”


    I kind of hope the whole ‘getting banned because of the odd bong hit’ gets dropped someday. Really Committee, weed is NOT terrible for you. Alcohol, on the other hand does have more potential to do harm to the body. Why don’t people get banned for drinking? Not saying they should do that, but I’m just trying to say how silly it all is. My boyfriend’s doctor said she’d rather him smoke weed than drink.

    Poor kid. If my old housemate had that happen to her every time she lit up, she’d be as rich as Phelps.

  • Didn’t he say the same thing when he got the DUI…I’m just saying…

    I mean hell…you like smoking pot…big deal…but don’t blame it on being 23 and ‘youthful’ behavior …you’re not that young.

  • CORRECTION: If my old housemate had a nickel every time she lit up and it was spread all over the news, she’d be as rich as Phelps.

  • it’s the price of fame
    everything he does can be taped and sold
    he has to live with that
    and keep an eye on his money

  • The guy can swim but half dolphin? I think you got your animals mixed up because there’s nothing but horse in that guy. Well, horse and some kind of undiscovered goblin creature that apparently likes to get high. I’ve heard tales that he could pull a wagon with well over 35 riding inside it.

  • i’ve never smoked pot, but i do think it’s probably on the same level as drinking, which i do do, and which is considered OK for athletes, as long as they don’t shoot themselves in their legs. i think it’s a shame if he loses out on endorsements because of this. maybe some will give him a break. i mean, people who are “recovering” addicts get breaks all the time. all he did was a hit on a bong. maybe he should do a weekend rehab stint. and yeah, he can’t top this year in swimming…may as well focus on other things…like milking it for endorsements. oops. i mean, other business ventures.

  • i think the guys who were partying with him and sold the pic wish they hadn’t done it now

    i know I wouldn’t want to have been instrumental in killing his chances for london 2012 (even though no one can be as instrumental as phelps, but still)

    and yeah, i think it shouldn’t be a big deal…

  • Wouldn’t it piss you off, just a wee bit, to know that you paid this adonis all that money for endorsements and he couldn’t muster the common sense to not get photographed?? I mean, really? So what? He smoked dope. Illegal? Yep. Photgraphed? Yep. C’mon. He is a dum-dum. “I’m young” Okay? So is That lame ass excuse….don’t need to see you toking it up.

  • How is he a role model? Because he swims? Please explain how swimmers are role models.

    No celebrity, athlete or politician is a role model.