… several of the Danity Kane girls, talking about their group breaking up soon, because Aubrey O’Day is “fucking everything up.”

Aubrey’s actually in this photo, taken yesterday.

She’s the one hiding behind the scary clown.

There’s been nothing mini about Minnie Driver lately, but luckily for all of us those days are now behind us.

After three long years of pregnancy, Ms. Driver finally gave birth to son Henry Story Driver, on Friday in LA. The little boy weighed in at 9 pounds, 12 ounces, and Minnie’s still keeping mum on the identity of the father. Not that anyone would care anyway.

Congrats, Minnie.

At the Marc Jacobs show.

Who would’ve thought we’d ever see the day?

Mary-Kate Olsen and Nicole Richie, both smiling for a photograph, and neither looking like they might blow over if somebody sneezes.

MK’s little rat-tail braid?

Is another story.

But, in general, they both look great, and really healthy, and that’s great to see. I was tired of trying to decide which of them to put more money on in the company’s bi-monthly Death Pool. Now everything just goes to Amy Winehouse.

At the Proenza Schouler show at NY Fashion Week.

Ha ha ha!

I’m just kidding, you guys.

Don’t bother answering that.

The Nip/Tuck hottie shows off what she paid for at an after party at the Toronto Film Festival.

Ugh, sorry I’ve been gone all day, you guys. It’s been a busy day.

The good news: I am actually getting a refund on my 2007 taxes! Plus that $600 economic stimulation thingy. Yes, you read that right. My 2007 taxes. Which just got finished today. Sigh. Like I said, long day.

The bad news: So, I wanted to make this absence up to you guys by watching the Verne Troyer sex tape and giving you all a full report. So I shelled out the $9.95 for a membership (hey, it’s tax-deductible for me!) and I have a login, but I can’t for the life of me get the damn thing to work, possibly because it requires Windows Media Player which I can’t seem to download for my Mac? Or possibly because the whole site’s a bunch of bullshit anyway.

I don’t know.

So I’m gonna let you guys figure it out.

The website is sexwithmini.com and here’s my login info:

Update: Removed because apparently the site detects duplicate logins. Can someone just tell me how to download WMP for the Mac?

Second Update: So I got WMP installed (thanks to your tips!) and I still can’t seem to see any Mini-Me sex tape. Has anyone actually read on any blog that anyone’s actually watched this thing? I wonder if the whole thing’s just a hoax … although the screen shots on the front page of the members area look quite real.

Go figure out what I need to do to watch this tape, you guys. On a Mac.

Until that happens, here’s a new pic of the very gorgeous Halle Berry and her hottie baby-daddy, Gabriel Aubry, leaving a Calvin Klein in NYC today.