Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Michael Phelps on SNL: What’s the Verdict?

My opinion, in general, was quite simple: NOT NAKED ENOUGH.

Honestly, though, between the Palin/Clinton sketch at the start and the Cathy bit on Weekend Update (if you find that bit on YouTube, PLEASE let me know), I hardly even noticed Phelpsy was there. Probably for the best.

I would have noticed him more if he were nakeder. And more in my bed. With his gold medals hanging around his neck and a pillow draped gently over the entirety of his face. And he would be silent except to occasionally whisper hot sexy things in my head while managing not to use any of the letters that he lisps. And he is absolutely not allowed to scream “Oh yes!” when he orgasms, because if I’m having sexual intercourse with a man and he lisps while coming, my vagina will probably fall off.

31 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Think olympic champion. Think 6ft 4. Think size 14 feet (and you know what that means!). Your vagina stands no chance.

  • About snl: meh. Phelps could have been worse (not to say that he was amazing or anything, but hey, the guy’s a swimmer, not an actor) and to the credit of the show, they used him sparely. But then there was nothing very amazing in the sketches (dragging a Charles Barkley impersonation from the dead? huh?). The Palin / Clinton sketch is what will be remembered, though…

    But the more nakedness… totally! When are you signing on the snl team, beet? ;)

  • hahah… with a pillow over his face… He was not as bad as Paris Hilton on the show.. He actually wasnt bad at all and I am glad they used him sparingly. I liked the sketch where he played that weird little boy (u know where they kept coming out of nowhere and Andy Sandberg and Kenan T’s would freak out)… Its like he was meant to play that part. And yes, he should have been nakeder!

  • I loved him as the freaky kid… and the “Michael Phelps diet”
    I have to say, however, that I really wanted him to take his clothes off…seriously that is up with that.

  • you can find the links for the open, the phelps diet, tmobile spot and the charles barkley sketch at http://www.hulu.com

    not sure if we are allowed to links to other websites, so I will understand if this is deleted.

  • “With his gold medals hanging around his neck and a pillow draped gently over the entirety of his face”
    …comedy gold…gold i tell ya!

  • I loved the Sarah Palin skit. Best of the night. The Phelps diet one was great too.

    My question is: What happened to Kristin Wiig’s nose? I have to assume she had a nose job. It just looks weird. Anyone here anything about that?

  • He was not good at all , completely off acting , can barely read on cardboards. probably the worst host ive seen on snl , but a great olympic champion thats for sure .

  • briana- i didn’t even watch it but as soon as i read it i thought that he couldn’t of been worse than Paris also! She was so so so awful.

  • He’s a really bad actor, and his face is cringe-inducing. But that’s why he’s in a profession where he doesn’t have to speak and his face stays mostly underwater, I guess.

  • This is what’s wrong with SNL. It’s a sketch comedy show. For some idiot reason they need to bring people on to host who are famous for one reason or other…. but definitely not comic actors. They had football players Tom Bradey and Peyton Manning and some NASCAR Driver. So the rest of the cast has to run around and try and be funny around these guys.

    Would you put Steve Martin into a NFL Football game? Put Tina Fey into an Olympic Swimming event? Comic actors work as hard at what they do as Olympic Athletes. it’s stupid and unfair that rather than giving a hard-working actor or standup comedian a chance to come out there and be funny they bring in somebody like Michael Phelps,

  • Agreed that it was silly to have him guest host. He’d have been great in a cameo. Also agreed that it was a foolish choice to have him totally dressed the whole time.

  • Personally, I think that the whole show sucked. It wasn’t just him. The opening skit was classic, “Noooo! Mine!”. It was too funny. But from there on it was all downhill. I just don’t get it. SNL should have some of the best writers in the industry, but it’s just crap! I love Michael Phelps as much as the next chick, but he couldn’t possibly shine in such a dingy environment.

  • Michael Phelps wasn’t naked enough or funny enough. Both of those things were the fault of the writers. Phelps wasn’t bad, the writers were! Hire decent writers, SNL producers, or give up! You had a great chance here and blew it. You had millions of us waiting and wanting. We still are…

  • UGH! This guy is *so* fugI am amazed at all the girls that find him hot.

    I mean really? He is a fucking dog and his mouth is jacked up. No way would I want any type of sexy times with this guy. There are so many actual hot guys out there. I just do not get it.