Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Suri Cruise Is Adorable

She is not as cute as Shiloh, IMHO, who is destined to be The Most Beautiful Human in the History of the Species, but she’s still pretty darned cute, especially in that little dress and gold slippers.

If only Katie could wear something that cute!

Is it just me, or is Katie slowly becoming, like, the long-lost Olsen triplet? Fraternal triplet, of course. But still.

My mom left town this afternoon, after a visit that may have lasted a couple of days too long. I love my mother, and, when I was little, she always had her make-up on and her hair blown out all pretty and a lovely outfit on. But then life happened, and she now considers herself to be more of a spiritual creature than someone who dwells in a world of material concerns. So we’re walking around the mall today, and I keep offering to buy her nice clothes or new sunglasses or teeth whitening or something and she’s just like, “No, no, you save your money, sweetheart,” and I realized that it just bothers me so, so much that she has completely abandoned all the “values” she impressed on me as a child. So I’m weighed down with all these material concerns — Does my hair look alright? Is this the right shade of lipstick? I can’t wear those white shoes, it’s after Labor Day — that she has so gloriously transcended, after neatly passing them on to me. And I realize that I’m fucking bitter about this. And I just kind of snapped at her in the mall, like, “Jesus, Mom, why do you insist on dressing like a homeless woman?” And she, of course, is like “I am plenty rich in spirit,” etc, etc. And then I realized that I’m a huge, snobby asshole who really needs to get over myself. And then I bought hair extensions. So whatever. My spiritual growth is clearly incomplete. But I’m working on it.

I don’t know what my point was. Just, like, this picture seemed to perfectly capture the image of me and my mom walking in the mall today. Except my mom’s shoes weren’t that cute and I’m not an alien.

39 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Too bad cutie is picture with pegandroll. I agree shiloh is cuter though.
    And that anecdote of yours is adorable.

  • How come this kid is still drinking from a bottle? Weird.

    Beet….I have always wondered what it is about moms and daughters that press sensitive buttons we never really knew we had. The older I get, the more I realize that I can’t change my mother and she can’t change me. I can listen to everything she tells me, but it’s my job–as an adult–to filter out the stuff I don’t like. Love her and show some support for her choices and opinions. Eventually, if you show her your strengths, she will give her love and support to you in return.

    Did that sound too Oprah-ish? LOL

  • Mobby – Oprahish ? NO. That was dead on. We cannot help/stop the love – even if we wanted to. None of us, no matter what we wish for will Ever be loved by anyone we would want to even compare to good ole MOM

  • Puberty’s gonna hit Shiloh like a freight train. She’s named after a dog, for Pete’s sake.

  • I have to agree, Suri is adorable. What WTF is up w/that bottle? My youngest is Suri’s age and she stopped the bottle when she was nearly a year! She is now drinking out of regular cups (albeit small ones!). Don’t dentists clearly state that bottles will rot teeth???? Oh well.

    And Beet – the mother/daughter relationship is a very complex one. It only took me about 32 years to get to a comfy point w/ my mom. Now, my oldest is about to hit puberty, so the cycle continues!

  • EVERY child is suppose to start with a sipi cup by like, 1. What the fuck? Shes nearly 3, her teeth will be horrrrrible

  • Shiloh is stunning, very very gorgeous and suri has beautiful eyes and clothes. Even if i find it a little stupid to compare children, they all have something cute.

  • Beet, while I appreciate the “depth” of your post, I truly thought it was fucking hilarious. Go girl. Humor is the only way.

  • HAHAHA Beet, you’re so funny. I swear to god we need to get together and have a few drinks some time.

    You seem like you would be a great friend.

  • Beet,

    I work for my mom and I know that it can be tough. Just remember that she carried you for 9 months and loves you in ways that could be contradicary to your beliefs. Beet, I know that it can be trying at times, but if anyone can do it, it’s you! YOU ROCK!

  • Baggy pants for a day or two = need comfort.
    Baggy pants for a week = the Brits say she’s prego.

  • this kid is going to have some serious issues. you take the bottle away by age 12 months and if it pitches a fit, you let it.

    kids need to hear the word no when it is is their best interest – sorry honey, you can’t have a bottle because you are a big girl now and we want you to have healthy teeth. i don’t think this child has ever heard the word no.

    her teen years are going to be a gold mine for you beet.

  • she has to be pregnant- look at her posture. the only reason to slump forward like that is to hide a fetus.
    suri is cute but she looks like bjork. and the only thing more annoying than a kid that age with a bottle is a kid that age with a pacifier.

  • beet… it could be worse: you could be a gangly, badly dressed actress brainwashed into marrying a crazed actor/cult leader and impregnated with the frozen sperm of xenu!

  • I agree with the no bottle argument, but Katie can do whatever she wants. Maybe Xenu says bottles are okay for toddlers.

    If her teeth rot, I have a hunch her parents can afford to buy her new ones.

  • I wonder if that’s the same pair of pants that she’s wearing everyday or if she stocked her closet with multiple pairs? I hope these don’t catch on. At least I wouldn’t have to spend a lot of money for a new trend. I could purchase a great pair at Goodwill for three bucks. IF I ever decided to wear such hideous pants, that is.

  • I love Suri. I think she’s way cuter than Shiloh, and I think it’s sad she’s saddled with an upbringing in a cult.

  • You confuse well dressed and beauty, there 2 cute things on her, her clothes, and her eyes. Have you seen the pics on the playground? She doesn’t look cute, and things will getting worse with the time. I’m not saying that shiloh is a stunning beauty but she sure looks cuter, happier, and more alive than suri.

  • Suri is definitely, definitely cuter than Shiloh. There is only one picture that I’ve ever seen of Shiloh where she didn’t look like she had bad botox done. I hope Katie is pregnant, and I want them to have a boy!
    <3 Go Suri

  • I think Suri is a little strange looking-not cute at all! Shiloh is adorable! The new pics of her holding the new baby sister is precious!!

  • I agree “just me” lol She is a strange looking alien :P lmao. At least she has shoes on now. And has anyone noticed that her alientology adapted mom has an outie belly button? It showed in a different pic. You would think that if you had an outie belly button like she does, you would wear your pants higher so it wouldn’t polk out more than your nunues (sound it out lol I don’t know how to spell it lol). Or do you think she has a belly button ring? . . . . . doubt it. (Love Shiloh! And you don’t see the Jolie-Pitt kids using baba’s that long)

  • << would correct typo right now :P poke out . . . . Must be thinking of next years polk salad . . . . noooooo :P And I hope you know what the nunues are . . . :))

  • Suri is sooo much cuter than Shiloh. Not that Shilo isn’t cute, but come on. Do people just think she’s cute because they are in love with (obsessed with) Brad Pitt? Besides, just because two people are considered beautiful does NOT mean they will have beautiful children.

  • Why the bottle? My daughter has been drinking from a regular cup since she was 14 months old, no top or anything, geez. Come on, let’s get off the lazy parenting bandwagon here and teach the kid!

    Katie, it takes about 2 weeks, just don’t have her wear her cashmere sweater because she’ll most likely ruin it when she spills but she’ll be a pro in no time!