[Disclaimer: Before you get mad at me for "taking sides" in any form of voting that will not take place on a reality TV show, please read this.]
We've mentioned previously that the Hilton camp can't be particularly thrilled that they donated money to the McCain campaign, only to see Barack Obama unfavorably compared to Paris in his most recent campaign ad.
Now comes confirmation from a flurry of political blogs.
I hear whispers from the inner campaign staff that the phone was burning...
Can't. Stop. Laughing. />...
Dressing like it's 1992 will not, in fact, actually make it 1992 again.
It's 2008, and you married Tom Cruise, and nothing you do can ever change that.
I'm so sorry, sweetheart.
Here's Katie leaving rehearsals for her Broadway debut in the revival of All My Sons, which is having some trouble selling tickets.
Here's my theory: Katie spent the night at her secret lover's penthouse (Eliot Spitzer? Maybe.) and didn't have clean clothes to wear the next day, so she slipped on a pair of his jeans an...
Congrats to 25-year-old Heather Matarazzo, who just got engaged to her girlfriend, Carolyn Murphy.
"It was really cute. First Heather proposed to Carolyn, then Carolyn proposed to her," said Heather's publicist. She says it was "it was love at first sight" for the twosome, who have been together over a year.
That's an eternity in Hollywood years!
Congrats to Heather and Carolyn!...
No, no. I did not suck a gigantic cock, although I know, at first glance, that is what this picture indicates.
This is a photograph of the pointer finger on my right hand.
And, this morning, while attempting to boil water for tea on the stove, I burned it in the shape of the Bat-Signal!
Do you see?
What do you guys think this means???
(Besides the fact that I should stay the fuck out of the kitchen.)
[gallery]...
Heeeee!
A Portland-area theater was changing its marquis from Hancock to The Dark Knight when someone snapped an ill-timed photo.
I don't think this is Photoshopped, but, frankly, I don't care if it is. I still love it so very much. Cinemagic, indeed!...
Is Audrina Patridge's new blog.
Whatever CelebBuzz is paying her to do this, it is WAY too much. And whatever they're paying her ghostwriter? Way, way, WAY too much.
Hire me instead! I can plug stupid beauty products and restaurants and actually make it interesting. Who cares about what Audrina Patridge uses for face wash? I wanna know she takes to make her eyes look so weird! I'd buy it for Halloween and totally freak everyone out!
...
It's not even that slow a news day, but somehow E! has written an entire story about how LiLo and SamRo were allowed to chainsmoke inside Crown Bar in WeHo last night. Can you believe it? The management didn't even complain.
You know what else, you guys?
It's an EVIL BEET EXCLUSIVE!!!!
Lindsay Lohan just turned 21 last year. But somehow she's been frequenting the club scene for about five years. By my calculations, this means she was underage for several years when she was drinking in clubs, and the management didn't even complain.
Can you believe it? Celebrities are...
"Miss Hilton was neither asked, nor did she give permission, for the use of her likeness in the ad, and has no further comment," her rep said in a statement, referring to footage of Paris being used in this commercial for John McCain.
Britney's rep had no comment at all.
And, just for the record, some of you guys seem to think that because I'm making fun of a stupid commercial and pointing out that Jon Voight is possibly -- just possibly -- not qualified to write a political op-ed column f...
I mean, it kind of makes sense. What else is he going to do? Beat them up?
This time, Verne's suing his ex-girlfriend and sex tape partner, Ranae Shrider, for "intentional infliction of emotional distress and battery." Verne's lawyer claims his former housemate "once picked the lock to his bedroom door, pushing away a 100 pound scooter that was used to block the door, and then throwing him to the floor." His lawyer, in a statement to TMZ, adds that "when you pick up a 2'8" human being and throw him to the floor, it hurts."
And you know what he's suing her for?
$...
"If you notice, since Britney started wearing clothes and behaving; Paris is out of town not bothering anybody anymore, thank God, and evidently, Lindsay Lohan has gone gay, we don't seem to have much of an issue."
LA Police Chief William Bratton, reacting to certain legislators hoping to pass laws to contain the paparazzi. Bratton went on to call the legislations "a farce," and said that "if the ones that attract the paparazzi behave in the first place, like we expect of anybody, that so...
There was a hearing today to determine whether or not Jamie Spears would retain his conservatorship over Britney moving forward, and a court decided that, thank goodness, he will.
The conservatorship will stay in place until at least December 31 of this year.
This is probably a good thing for Britney and the rest of the world in general. It's just a very sad thing if you were holding your breath for new photos of Britney's Britney. And by that second "Britney" I of course mean "vagina....