Today's Evil Beet Gossip

What Happened Here?

It looks like Father Time took Molly Ringwald out to the shed and raped her.

Seriously what the fuck happened here?

It’s like her lips couldn’t take any more Botox so they just started injecting it into her chin. All twenty vials.

Here’s Molly at the Dr. Frank Ryan Bony Pony Ranch Foundation fundraiser in LA. When I first heard the name of the charity, I was like “That’s a rather insensitive name for an eating disorder treatment center, don’t you think?”

But, no, it’s a camp for underprivileged kids. So that’s good, at least.

42 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Beet,

    It’s to the point where I just look at the picture and then read the first one or two sentences so I can get the gist of the story. I stopped reading your entire blog sometime ago. First, cursing is not cute and by no means makes you or your writing more appealing. It neither gets your point across faster nor enhances the meaning of your intended message. I’m sure that you possess the ability to display a more polished vernacular.

    Second, abrasive sexual language is offensive. There is just no other way to state this. On several occasions you have posted lewd and obscene comments that were inappropriate for a gossip blog.

    I am fully aware that this is your blog and you have the right to say and express what and how you feel. I respect this and by no means am I out to censor you. I’m not a prude, however, I have certain standards in my own life. For this reason, you have finally lost this reader.

  • Yes, but she doesn’t show titty photos any more. Rape jokes are okay. Drugs are okay. Just don’t show a boob.

    As for Molly, she doesn’t look that much different. She is a red head and never was very attractive.

  • beet-

    “i live in a cave in the first millenium. i am offended by your language, so i only read the first two sentences of your blog an look at the pretty pictures. in a perfect world you don’t drop any f-bombs or talk about and smelly hoo-ha’s in the two sentences that i allow myself to read. i am so offended that i’ve been continuing to read your blog regardless of your offenses. i’m not a prude, but i like to censor myself to language equivalent to sesame street, it’s the standard i keep myself to in mine and big bird’s life. you’ve finallylost this reader. (except for the pretty pictures of course.)”

    blah, blah, blah…
    -shannon

  • i, for one, really appreciated this post. in fact, i literally rolled on the floor laughing my ass off after i read about her getting fucked by father time.
    keep up the great work beet!

  • holy fuck. Its hard to believe it’s been 25 years since I jerked off to her. Does she have any daughters?

  • Hey Shannon,

    If the seeing the word “fuck” offends you, then fuck off you fucking prude. You must not drive a car because if you did “FUCK” would be a staple in your vocabulary. Have fucking great day!!!

    annoyed

  • That first sentence was pure gold, I actually laughed out loud.

    I’m with Donkey Punch on the whole red-headed thing. Women are usually ok though but the men…. shudder.

  • Ya’ll, I love Beet, think she is way funny and very smart, not to mention thoughtful and clever.

    And. AND Shannon has the right to say whatever she thinks/feels. In fact, having a wide range of views and responses is important on this blog – without that range, Beets bosses are not going to be happy with her. A wide range of opinions means Beet is doing a great job – even when those opinions don’t agree with her.

    So. Grow up. And if you are the twelve year olds you sound like, then stop giving yourself away; and if you are older than 12, well, give it a rest. It is all ok. Beet is a grown-up herself and your mindless bashing of another blogger, and your inability to find any useful words other than fuck is just a throw away.

  • Some red heads are attractive (but not many). I met Julianne Moore when we shot her for an interview on the “The Forgotten” press junket. Rather attractive piece of ass if you don’t mind me objectifying her.

  • I just saw her doing an interview for her lastest movie and she didn’t look half as bad as she does in these photos. Also, those glasses don’t help at all.

  • Awww. Is that male hottie hers? If so, go Molly. The hair is styled all wrong for her, her lips were big even before collagen was readily available, she’s either plump or preggers & those hyper-tweezed eyebrows are atrocious but even so she’s held up well.

    Not everybody goes for redheads, but those that do tend to go for them in a really big way.

  • Hey, she’s gotta be an old lady now. What 40 something? Cut her some slack. I’d rather see a REAL person than some fake scary thing like those Desperate Housewives.

  • @ Donkey Punch

    Don’t say shes a piece of ass in front of 89 year old Shannon-she might leave

    Fuck fuck fuck

  • i think it’s mostly the fault of her glasses here…recent pics of her arent that bad, so that is a bit confusing.

  • P.S- shannon mentioned that certain comments by beet were “inappropriate for a gossip blog”. No offense, Beet, but since when are gossip blogs the most classy places? I feel like of all places, you should be able to say whatever the hell you want on a gossip blog!

  • Gabriela… if I throw something shiny into oncoming traffic, will you chase after it? Shannon was the person trying to dictate censorship here – not us. We are the ones telling her to fuck off and write her own Rated G blog elsewhere, if she doesn’t like the adult language here.

  • Julianne Moore is nice when she doesn’t pretend she’s crying
    because she looks like she’s grimacing
    I also think The Russo and the Sarandon women are ok
    I even find the Midler one cute
    but Gillian Anderson is also nice to look at
    looking backwards in time Rita Hayworth was also interesting
    and if I kept here for longer maybe some more would pop in my mind..
    …the interesting thing about redheads is their resistance to anesthetics
    it’s a matter of receptors

  • why do people bother complaining about other people’s blogs? There are like 14 million gossip blogs out there– it shouldn’t be too hard to find one that’s rated G.
    Also, the reason I like this blog is mostly because of Beet’s hilarious commentary and peoples irreverent comments. The celebrity gossip is just a bonus.

  • Aw Beet…

    Rape jokes are NOT funny. Seriously.

    Maybe you can go with something like “beat her with an ugly stick” next time?

  • Oh dear Donkey Punch! Here I was developing a net crush on you and it sounds like you don’t like redheads. I shall take my waist length auburn hair and fling it in your virtual face. BTW, Molly should lay off the collagen. Her lips look ready to explode!

  • I for one enjoy redheaded guys, but the cute ones are few and far between. It’s a fine line between hot (with freckles) and too geeky.

    Oh, and nobody have an e-crush on DP! He’s all married and stuff. But if it’s kosher, I called him first. Like, ten pages ago.

  • I don’t dislike all red heads, just the really pink ones like Lohan.

    I forgot about Gillian Anderson. She really used to float my boat.

  • Looks like Asta and Okie are going to have to go a few rounds and see who has the best Donkey Punch! Winner takes on Mrs. Donkey Punch in the championship round. I think Beet needs to be standing by with a bucket of ice water for a couple of cats fighting over a tom.

  • “I shall take my waist length auburn hair and fling it in your virtual face.”

    Ummm…waist-length auburn hair…?

    Damn, girl. Time for a cold shower.