Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Puppetry of the Penis!

Tonight Trish and I went to see Puppetry of the Penis here in Seattle. And, first off, I would like to give mad props to Trish for being the only one of my so-called “friends” out here to agree to go with me. She was, in fact, the only one to even return my email about it. My other “friends” in Seattle are loooosers (makes L-shape with hand on forehead).

If you guys have never heard of Puppetry of the Penis, it is basically just these two Australian dudes butt-naked on stage making shapes out of their penises. It’s like the clown who makes balloon animals, but with a cock and balls. It was truly phenomenal. I desperately wished I had a penis so I could go home and try some of these things. I mean, I knew penises were fun, but I had no idea how much fun! They did a baby bird, a hamburger, a windsail, a pelican, a hot dog, a bullfrog, the Eiffel Tower, a sea anemone (!) and many, many more. There were basically no props at all. Just two dudes and their penises and nutsacks. Amazing. If you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend you go if it comes to your city.

Before the show, Trish and I were like “I wonder if there’ll be any dudes.” I figured maybe a handful of gay dudes and a handful of really, really embarrassed straight dudes who got dragged there with their wives. But I was wrong! There were tons of guys there! Straight guys, too! Some with their significant others, some just with a buddy. And they totally didn’t seem embarrassed or sheepish or anything. They were just like “Bring on the penis shapes!” Soooo wonderful.

The funniest thing, though, is that as Trish and I were taking our seats, we noticed two women leading their husbands into the theater in blindfolds. We started cracking up immediately, like, “Oh my God these guys totally don’t know they’re going to a penis show!” And they were sitting front row!!! Ahhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha! I snapped a picture:

Once the show started, though, the blindfolds came off and the guys were really good sports about it. Which was great of them, but I was kind of hoping they’d throw a fit and storm out. Oh well.

Anyway, I sure do know what every guy on my Christmas list is getting this year: this.

16 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Oh my goodness… I saw one of their shows about four or five years ago completely baked out of my gourd. It has to be the craziest thing I’ve ever seen. It was impossible for us to contain our hysterical laughter. Jeff Foxworthy cracks some joke about being at the family picnic with some uncle in those itty bitty shorts, talkin about something falling out that looks like a baby bird. Every single time I hear that joke, I think of these dudes.

  • genital origami is the national pasttime here in australia. im working on the female sea anemone at the moment – wow, that wasn’t hard at all.

  • I was there on Friday night and you didn’t give the snail the kind of credit I feel it deserves! From the opening comedy act to the end of the show it was AWESOME! I came home and tried to teach my husband how to make a hamburger!!

  • why wouldn’t guys like it? they play with their dicks all the time! You know every guy there went home and tried all the different things they saw. I heard about this show years ago and have always wanted to go.

  • wow lmao they have a show like this but im sure those husbands were amazed and they proboby got some that night =x

  • I saw that show and it was not that good, point less. Not sure why they allow a show like that, its like a strip club just without the stripping. It was stupid I hope it gets banned.

  • April is NO FUN at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    On the other hand, sounds like a blast!!! I wish I lived on the West Coast, I soooooooo would’ve gone w/ you, unlike your other loser ‘friends’ ;)

    Penises are great…Penises making shadows? HELL YEAH!!! Count me in! Oh yeah, those blindfolded guys=Hilarious!!! I can’t believe their wives pulled it off-good for them! =)