Dec 28, 2007 at 01:17 am by Evil Beet

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The Hilton clan left Hawaii on Wednesday to descend on an unsuspecting Los Angeles.

I have to say, though, Paris has been behaving herself nicely — I mean, in Paris terms — since her little jail stay.

Will this behavior continue into 2008?

Man, I hope not.

Seriously, with Lindsay staying sober and Paris staying out of trouble, I have just one thing to say: I AM EXPECTING BIG THINGS FROM YOU, MILEY CYRUS!! Get out there and DRINK, bitch!

Image via Splash

Dec 28, 2007 at 01:09 am by Evil Beet

Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn, Pictures, Photos

OMG.

Who the fuck cares?

Sean Penn and his wife, Robin Wright, are divorcing after 11 years of marriage.

They have two children together: Hopper Jack, 14, and Dylan Frances, 16.

My college boyfriend and I used to joke that we wanted to name our youngest son Horseman, just because it would be the coolest thing ever to have a little kid be all like, “What’s up? My name’s Horseman” and it would obviously be a dating advantage to him when he got older. He’d be all like, “What’s up? My name’s Horseman. That’s right, baby. Horse. Man. Boo-yah.” Horseman would be such a pimp.

Anyway. We thought we’d come up with the craziest baby name ever. But Sean Penn wins this battle, with a son named Hopper.

Hopper!

If this kid doesn’t develop a raging drug problem, I don’t know what I’ll do with myself.

Also: I’m obsessed with Robin Wright’s dress in this photo. Gorgeous!! (Photo taken Sept 18 of this year, so they were putting on a brave front as of 3 months ago.)

Dec 28, 2007 at 12:53 am by Evil Beet

Britney Spears Leaving Starbucks, Possibly with Weed in Her Car

Is there Marijuana in Britney Spears’ Car?

Leaving a Starbucks in WeHo on Wednesday night.

I feel like she’s been wearing that sweatshirt for weeks now.

Also, there’s a little baggie in the front panel of her car. I can’t tell what’s in it, but I can guess. I’ve blown up several shots of it — all from pics in this set — so you guys can be your own judges.

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Image via WENN

Dec 28, 2007 at 12:40 am by Evil Beet

Jessica Alba Baby Bump Pictures, Leaving the Gym

Jessica Alba Baby Bump and Acne Pictures, Leaving the Gym

Jess left the gym on Wednesday in a tight shirt, giving paps a view of that baby bump.

You know what’s really sad?

That’s just kind of what my stomach normally looks like. But on stick-thin Jessica, it’s obviously a baby bump. She’s also sporting some crazy acne. That’s hot.

Image via Splash

Dec 27, 2007 at 04:50 pm by Evil Beet

To her baby daddy, Cash Warren.

Booooooooooooring.

Okay, I’m going back to trying to enjoy my afternoon with my family. Be back later tonight.

Dec 27, 2007 at 12:25 pm by Evil Beet

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Lindsay’s rehaboyfriend is trying to sell “intimate” photos of Lindsay to the tabs.

On Dec. 26, dozens of magazine editors awoke to an e-mail from a well-known photo agency. The e-mail included several snapshots of Lohan in various states of undress, and boasted that the pics were “personal photos taken by Riley Giles while he was dating Lindsay Lohan.”

You’d think Lindsay would have learned her lesson about letting people take incriminating photos of her, but still. This was a totally dick thing of Riley to do. What a loser. You got dumped, Riley. What? Did you think Lindsay Freakin’ Lohan was going to marry your snowboarding ass? Move the fuck on.

Or, check back into the Cirque Lodge. You clearly still have some resentment issues, and I have a feeling Mischa Barton will be there any day now.