Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Pics of Mischa Barton Leaving Jail!

Mischa Barton Leaving Jail After DUI Arrest, Pictures, Photos

These have been around for a couple days, but, tragically, I suck at my job, so I’ve just now stumbled upon them.

Man, she looks like she had a rough night.

I almost feel bad for her. But then I think of what a happy day I had when I checked my email and learned that Mischa Barton had scored herself a DUI. Seriously, I got jack shit for Christmas this year. My dad wrote me a check and my mom puts about the same effort into Christmas as she does into Arbor Day, so the Mischa Barton DUI was like the pony I never got. (Note to parents for future: the pony should be pink and it should sing.) So then I think of my happiness and then I’m not sad for Mischa anymore. There’s a term for that. I think it’s “schadenfreude.” Webster’s defines it as “satisfaction or pleasure felt at someone else’s misfortune.”

That’s cool, Websters. You call it “schadenfreude.” I call it “what I do for a living.”

Mischa Barton Leaving Jail After DUI Arrest, Pictures, Photos Mischa Barton Leaving Jail After DUI Arrest, Pictures, Photos

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