See? I’m Pretty When I’m Airbrushed.
Nov 03, 2007 at 03:24 pm by Evil Beet

Jessica Simpson Celebrates Her Collection at Macy’s in Herald Square

Jessica Simpson celebrates the launch of the Jessica Simpson Collection at Macy’s by reminding us all how pretty she can be after professionals get their hands on a black-and-white photo of her.

Jessica Simpson Collection at Macys, Shoes, Pictures, Photos Jessica Simpson Collection at Macys, Bags, Purses, Pictures, Photos Jessica Simpson Collection at Macy’s, Dresses, Pictures, Photos

Whoever Styled Sarah Michelle Gellar for This Event Should Be Taken Outside and Shot
Nov 03, 2007 at 10:54 am by Evil Beet

Sarah Michelle Gellar at “Southland Tales” Premiere, Pictures, Photos

Here’s what we’re gonna do:

We’re going to minimize every part of your chest except for your underarm fat. Then we’re going to give you a necklace to make sure that eyes are drawn specifically to that underarm fat. Underarm fat is the new thin.

Then we’re going to make you look pregnant. With septuplets.

And since we don’t have time to do your hair, why don’t you just take a bath with a plugged-in blow-dryer? That’ll create a nice effect.

Sheesh.

Why Is Cheri Oteri Everywhere These Days?
Nov 03, 2007 at 10:46 am by Evil Beet

Cheri Oteri is Everywhere

Jessica Simpson’s new BFF is showing up on red carpets left and right lately, looking all glammed out and shit.

What’s up with that? She’s 45 years old. It’s a little too late to become an “it” girl.

In fairness, this red carpet event was for a movie she did, but I’ve seen more Cheri Oteri in the past few weeks than I have since she was on SNL.

Where’s Ashley?
Nov 03, 2007 at 10:41 am by Evil Beet

Lance Armstrong Runs the New York Marathon, Celebrates at Macy’s Herald Square

Lance Armstrong — who’s been linked to Ashley Olsen in recent days — showed up at Macy’s Herald Square in NYC on Friday in celebration of his second run of the New York Marathon, which will take place on Sunday.

He’s cute.

Cute like an old man is cute.

Ashley is probably in his pocket. Giving him a hand job or something. Must be convenient.

THE SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN: Dog’s Show Pulled from the Air
Nov 03, 2007 at 10:36 am by Evil Beet

Dog the Bounty Hunter Off the Air at A&E After Racist Rant

AMERICA WILL NOT TOLERATE RACISM!

A&E has officially decided to pull Dog the Racist Bounty Hunter from its schedule.

“In evaluating the circumstances of the last few days, A&E has decided to take `Dog The Bounty Hunter’ off the network’s schedule for the foreseeable future,” the network said in a statement Friday. “We hope that Mr. Chapman continues the healing process that he has begun.”

Learn more about the racist rant that started it all!

New Spice Girls Video
Nov 03, 2007 at 10:32 am by Evil Beet


























Check out the first video the Spice Girls have done together since, like, I figured out how to use a tampon.

“Headlines (Friendship Never Ends)” is boring as all hell.