Silly bitch had to go and wear underwear.

And is that Justin Bobby sitting next to her?

DUMP HIM!!!

From R&M:

Mariah Carey, drinking deeply at VH1′s Music Cares event, invaded the ladies’ room with two burly bodyguards. Two women already there say her security tried to evict them, but they refused to leave. Says one: “One of the bodyguards said to us, ‘If you’re going to stay, you better not watch Mariah pee.’  ”

What the fuck? Was she using a urinal? Was she going to pee in the sink? Or was she seriously worried that these women were going to get down on the floor and stick their heads under the door of her stall for a brief yet beautiful glimpse of Mariah Carey urinating?

Did anyone else watch it tonight?

It’s all the overwrought melodrama of Grey’s Anatomy without any of the excitement, humor or endearing characters.

This was a bad call, Kate Walsh. Get back to Seattle Grace ASAP.

Thank you, Brittany Snow.

“It kind of progressed into this thing where I needed to always be dieting and losing weight and more weight,” she says in an interview. “It became my life and I didn’t have any friends and this was definitely my best friend and I held on to it really tight.”

At 85 pounds, she says, “I knew that was a really low number and I knew that my hair was falling out and I had really weird skin. My face looked really weird and I was getting this fuzz on my face and I was always cold – always to the point of uncontrollably shaking, [but] I was more scared that 85 lbs. wasn’t good enough. I wanted to be lower.”

And lest you think we can just talk anorexia and be done with it …

THERE’S CUTTING, TOO!!!

YAY!!!!

“I would look at the scars and what I had done to myself and that would convince me not to eat. I also was crying for attention and I also really wanted someone to see my scars and help me and give me a hug.”

Kat McPhee’s reading this somewhere thinking to herself, “Dammit. Cutting! Of course! Why the fuck didn’t I think of that??”

We’re still hearing murmurings that Julia Roberts’ marriage may be in trouble. But it’s coming from National Enquirer, people, so take that into consideration. [popbytes]

Phil Spector, blah blah blah, mistrial, blah blah, I cannot fucking believe we’re going to have to completely ignore this story all over again. [Celebslam]

Ha! Just when I mentioned that Ashlee Simpson would never publicly admit to her nose job — her father does it for her! [Cele|bitchy]

Our good pal at IBBB is right on top of those Hills recaps. [IBBB]

Victoria Beckham’s new book is titled “That Extra Half an Inch.” And we’re supposed to believe she’s talking about shoes. [POTP]

I’ve simply run out of creative ways to say this: Kristin Cavallari is a trashy slut. [Drunken Stepfather]

Is Jessica Biel going to play Wonderwoman? I think she should just continue to play Wonderbra. [Celebrity Smack]

More Xtina preggers pics. [Derek Hail]

Britney Spears. Still crashing her car. [Ninja Dude]

New cutie-pie pics of Coco Arquette. [SOW]

People magazine has the exclusive on all the not-dating going on in Hollywood.

First up, Hayden Panettiere, who is reportedly not dating co-star Milo Ventimiglia. Says James Kyson Lee, who shares the screen with the not-couple in Heroes: “The rumor is not true. Let’s just end it there … I think we were just surprised because they’re 12 years apart – for people to even conceive that. I know there have been a lot of jokes, Hayden turning 18 and whatnot. At some point, you just have to let it go, and respect their privacy.”

And as for the murmurings about newly single Heath Ledger and model Helena Christensen? “It is so annoying,” Christensen says. “I can’t even tell you. The funny thing is that they write, ‘just out of a relationship with Josh [Hartnett] and now with Heath [Ledger].’ Josh is one of my dearest friends. … And in several different tabloids they wrote that we were biting each other’s faces off or something like that.”

So, there you have it. Nobody is dating anyone. Now quiet down.