I am notoriously horrible at picking out fake breasts. I can tell in the case of someone like Kendra, because those monsters defy all the laws of physics, but in the case of Jessica Simpson… I don’t know. Are they real? Are they fake? I’d guess real, the photo here is older, but it’s the most boobalicious shot I could find.
Simpson tells fashion designer pal Michael Kors, who writes about her in the August issue of Harper’s Bazaar, on newsstands July 24… “my boobs are real.”
Ok, fair enough. That’s not really the fun part though… here’s the fun part.
As for whether she prefers singing or acting, Simpson says, “In my music career, there have been moments of failure, and with acting, I haven’t had that yet. But music is opening up my heart and every emotion inside of me.”
Um… What?? She hasn’t had acting failures? Who amongst us has seen Employee of the Month? Who thought, regarding The Dukes of Hazzard, “Wow, this is something special.” The answers are: No one. And no one. She truly hasn’t had anything even resembling success yet in her acting career. If we defined success as “the planet Mars” the you’d have to say her career so far has been “shitty.” Hmm, that may be a poor analogy. But you get the idea – which is basically “does not compute.”
Perhaps she’s crazy. Or maybe her Ex hitting it from the back with that Vanessa chick in a hot tub got to her. Whatever the case I hope that interviewer did a 70’s style spit take when she said that.
Also, her sister got an entirely new face.
PS- If you missed me during my sabbatical I apologize. I went out into the celebrity forest and found out what was truly important to me: and that was being a real class A jerk-off.