Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Okay, So, After Eva Longoria and Tony Parker Get Married Tomorrow, Can We Stop Talking About Them Forever?

Eva Longoria and Tony Parker Are Boring

I mean, I guess Tony plays some manner of sport, and maybe he’s still relevant in that context — I wouldn’t know — so if you sports people still want to talk about him, I guess that’s okay with me, but can we just never hear about Eva Longoria again, please? How this woman continues to be relevant baffles me. Desperate Housewives hasn’t been good since what feels like some point during the Reagan administration, her film career never even started (she has one movie coming out in 2007, and its plot is described on IMDB as “a ghost tries to sabotage her former boyfriend’s current relationship with a psychic,” and, if I’m not mistaken, her role in 2008’s Food Fight involves her voicing some manner of anthropomorphic grocery product), and, frankly, I don’t even think she’s that hot. I just don’t understand why we still care about her. There’s still a war on in Iraq. Britain has a new prime minister. We’ve got an election coming up here in the U.S. And, for chrissake, Nicole Richie is pregnant. Don’t we have more important things to talk about than Eva Longoria?

Eva and Tony were legally married in a French civil ceremony today, although the formal ceremony and reception are taking place tomorrow. And after that, please, guys, no more Tony and Eva, okay?

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