Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Late-Night Links

In the oh-so-capable hands of Sarah Silverman, even beastiality is funny. [popbytes]

Celeb bikini watch brings us Vanessa Anne Hudgens today. We’ve got a whole summer of this ahead of us, kids! [Grumpiest]

And hooray for a Sienna Miller nip slip! [Drunken Stepfather]

See, it occurs to Britney Spears to cover her nipples with flowers, but cover her vagina with underwear? Why would she do that? [The Bosh]

Reese and Jake are still going strong. [Cele|bitchy]

Carmen Electra and what must have been a goddamn stable of airbrushers team up for her pictorial in FHM Russia. Honestly, this isn’t even a pictorial. Somebody painted this. The original, oil on canvas, is hanging in a museum in St. Petersberg. Carmen Electra hasn’t looked like this in 10 years and you know it, FHM. [CityRag]

BREAKING: Paris Hilton spends a truly unreasonable amount of time looking at herself in the mirror. [Gossip or Truth]

More pics of Britney’s San Diego HoB show. [Allie is Wired]

Hayden Panettiere’s 10-year-old brother is about two years away from the disturbing realization that he totally wants to bang his sister. [Ninja Dude]

Rosie won’t be fighting with Elizabeth Hasselbeck anymore, lest such blatant liberalism somehow interfere with her co-host’s pregnancy. I don’t know. Whatever. [ASL]

You know, guys, it’s really hard for Keira Knightley to eat when you keep calling her anorexic. All the stress just takes her appetite right away. But not, like, in an anorexic way. It’s just that refusing to eat is her response to high-stress situations. Sheesh. [MollyGood]

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