If you were less than amused by my most recent reality show pitch, you’ll be pleased to know I’m moving away from reality TV and focusing on documentaries now.

Tonight I envisioned a documentary about the male on-camera talent in the porn industry. We’ll call it Hard at Work. The details are unimportant.

Contact evilbeet@gmail.com for option rights.

My friend Brian has an uncanny but glorious gift for finding pictures on the Internet that never should have been taken in the first place, had the better instinct of anyone present been alive to kick in. Here’s the one he sent me today. Caption suggestions welcome in the comment section.

Okay that was cheesy. But it stays.

So anyway…

Disney begins the delicate process of inching away from noted Jew-hater Mel Gibson, with ABC cancelling his upcoming miniseries about the Holocaust. I hope that was a no-brainer, ABC.

Next on Disney’s formidable chopping block may be Gibson’s latest passion project, Apocalypto, the Mayan-language tour-de-force that is, perhaps, a thinly veiled vehicle for Gibson’s long-held hatred of Spaniards (who, you gotta admit, have been responsible for their damn fair share of “all the wars in the world”). It’s hard to be sure, though, because, you know, the movie’s in fucking Mayan.

The trailers boast a release date of Summer 2006, but the latest data from Touchstone has the film slated for early December. Anyone know when the shift occurred?

Update: Never mind, Disney says they are going to move forward with the Mayan-language release of Apocalypto in December. The English-language release will follow never. And 73% of the country is so totally psyched for it!

Yup! His name is Danny Glover (ring a bell?), and the most inflammatory thing he did this weekend was help Puerto Rican hotel workers unionize in hopes of seeing better pay and benefits. “The union’s fight is to construct a world in which we want to live,” Glover said at a press conference on Sunday, before tossing back a few cold ones and referring to the reporter from Reuters as “sugar tits.” Oh, wait, except that last part totally didn’t happen. Thank you, Danny Glover.

We forget that people outside of the blue states go to see movies too. You’ll be pleased to know that Americans are marginally more sensitive to CNN’s out-of-context racial epithets; still, on average, they appreciate your input, but their hate speech is fine just the way it is, ma’am: